She calls me amazing when I know it isn't true. I don't tell her why it isn't though. I'm sitting here with pain pills in my system because I am weak. I'm sitting here pushing away my feelings so I can be numb. Instead I let her think I am, when in fact I'm not. I'm just a broken piece of shit with too many problems. I'm just worthless. But I don't want her to know that. So I won't tell her. Not yet. I want her to see the girl I used to be, the girl I want to be. Not this horrifying shell of a human being.
