I just found out today. That you wished not just my mother but also my grandmother a happy mothers day. That you were texting my mom. And talked with my grandma on the phone. At first i was grateful. It was nice of you to take time to put them back into your life for a second. But then, then i got angry.
You left.
You didn't even say goodbye.
Its like you walked out of an empty house and never looked back. Except this house isn't empty, nor did it want you to leave.
But you did and now you think its okay to do that? To bring them back in on your terms? You don't even check on the kids anymore but you can call my grandmother? Your actions make no sense. But maybe they never did. I just was refusing to see it.
But after all that; the anger and the thankfulness, i was left with being hurt. You could check up on my mother and my grandmother for Christ's sake! But not me... And maybe that sounds selfish. And i don't know why i want you to care or to check on me after all of this because I should hate you. But im hurt and confused because I still love you. After everything we have been through and after all the choices we have made, i still fucking love you. And that, that's almost more confusing than why you left.
But thank you for wishing them a happy mothers day. I know it meant the world to them. Because they still love you too.
