A thug , money , and bitches

Forgiviness is hard

I can't believe Killa shot me in the leg. Mariah ran and got the kit and cared to my leg.

" Aghhhhhh shit yo," I yelled

Mariah applied pressure on the wound, shaking her head.

" You shot my fucking brother Jayceon ! What is wrong with you." Mariah yelled.

" I didn't fucking kill him. Relax. You know what you doing, he'll live unfortunately." Jay said looking me in my eyes.

I came here to make it right with my sister and her husband and this nigga just fucking shot me.

" You know what Jay. I came here to be a real man and apologize to you and my sister because I was wrong and to explain. But you want to pull out guns and shoot. If I didn't care about my sister I would have shot your ass too." I spat.

" No Nigga you mean if you didn't care about your life. You know how I get that's why you ain't pull your guy out bitch ass nigga." Jay yelled.

" JAYCEON !! THAT IS ENOUGH! OKAY! Stop ! I can't take this anymore." She yelled pulling my stickers tighter.

I squeezed the couch tighter.

" No how you gonna forgive this Nigga ? How many times you cried for the last couple months? Cried yourself to sleep? I'm not about to let you forgive this man when he hurt you like that . Fucking brother or not he broke your entire heart. I can't and I'm not. That's it." Jay spat , rolling his weed.

" And what about when you cheated on me and broke my heart? What about when you said you'd never hurt me and broke me? I was so lost and we had Liyana . Or do you not remember that? If I wouldn't of forgave you after all that hurt and your deceit then we wouldn't be married right now and we wouldn't have the twins . I wouldn't be sleeping next to you every night , cooking for you , all that shit if I didn't forgive you. I forgave you because I love you . This is my damn brother Jayceon . I love him and this is the only blood family that I know. If I forgave you , then I could forgive him too. You out of all people should know. Or does it not count because it was you? Don't be selfish . At the end of the day people make mistakes and they learn from them and you should understand that 100 percent. You can take all the time you need to forgive Nel. But that's not your decision to tell me when I can forgive him too." Pooch said patching up my wound.

Jay just got up off the couch and went upstairs without saying anything back. He didn't even look at me or Pooch.

" Thanks Lil sis ." I said

" Don't thank me. You shouldn't of did what you did . If I was ever in a situation and I had to choose between you or Jay , I would never pick Jay .. shit I would never pick at all. You're my brother and he's my husband, I wouldn't put anybody in that situation because it'll get ugly like how it got with me and Mia because her mouth , me and you because you chose her , you and Jay because he's trying to protect me , and me and Jay because again he's just trying to protect me . But I am sorry that he shot you." She said sitting next to me.

" I know it'll take time and I'm not even sure if you are willing but I would like for you to, when your ready of course, try and meet Mia half way. I already talked to her and she wanted to come her today but I told her not to because I wasn't sure how you would react. Just please . Think about it." I pleaded.

" Yeah because I would have probably beat her ass again. I know you said you did what you did because you know how I am but you should have kept it neutral and checked her for her mouth at the damn door and I wouldn't of checked her damn chin . I have to control that but she also needs to control her mouth around this family and it ain't like she don't know . She grew up damn there around everybody that's in our circle, so there ain't no excuses. " she said laying her head on my shoulder

I squeezed her tight and kissed her forehead.

" I know sis and I apologize." I said

Killa

I'm so fucking mad yo. I don't even feel like arguing with Mariah because I fuck around and choke her. She going to forgive Nell for what? Because that's her brother . He foul as hell . He chose another bitch over his own blood, family . Then wanna crawl back talking about some that's all he got. I don't buy that shit and I'm not tryna fucking hear it either . She tried to bring up when I cheated on her. That shit was so fucked up and made sick to my stomach after when I realized how I hurt her, but I never chose that bitch over her or anybody else over Mariah. It would never be no situation that I'm going to put my hands on Mariah because of somebody else. Hell no and if I'm not going to do that then nobody else damn sure ain't doing that . It's the principle and Mariah just looking at it through the eyes of love. I'm not and that's why I shot his ass. I didn't Kill him because I know Pooch would never forgive me but she being real stupid right not, keep forgive this bum ass nigga. Anybody who put they hands on my wife for whatever reason is dead to me and I don't give a fuck what nobody got to say about it. I'm just trying to calm myself down because when Pooch come up here I don't want to lash out on her and it be a big fight. I'm not trying to let this shit cause any problems in my marriage. Shit is hot right now and I need my wife more than anything right now. Feds trying to dig up a case from old shit me and Silence did in the streets. Fucking years and we untouched but now we clean and they want to start digging? I honestly don't know what they got on us and what's going to happen but I got some pigs on the inside and I'm waiting for them to give me an update on what's going on. I don't want my kids to go through what me and my moms had to go through when my pops got locked up years ago. I'm glad he out and doing good for my moms but he missed out on a lot of important shit in my life. But I don't say anything because it'll just hurt my mom even more. Nothing matters more to me then my wife and kids. I just don't want to disappoint them and have to be without them. I never want my kids to have to come and visit me anywhere that's not at home, especially not no prison cell.

I laid down in the bed with our big ass dog Bruce. I swear this big mufucka think he like the size of a yorkie dog . We was watching sports center and that's when Mariah came through the door. She took off her pants and laid in the bed . Bruce moved from the edge of the bed by me till snuggled up with Pooch.

" Kennel left and I cleaned up the kitchen." She said.

" oh yeah. Well how did the rest of it go with your brother ?" I asked.

" With Kennel. It went actually pretty good with him right after you stormed off upstairs like a bitch baby." She spat

" Yo Mariah . Watch your fucking mouth. You said what you said and it wasn't no need for me to say nothing back. I let you and Kennel have ya'll time. Don't sit up here trying to lecture me about forgiving him because you wasting hour breath . That grown ass man put his hands on my very wife that I love to death. So if anything, thank me that that Nigga is still above ground. I'm not talking about this shit with you, so drop it." I said getting out of bed.

Mariah got up and followed me into our bathroom.

" Where you going Jay? Why you always trying to walk away from a conversation. You never wanna express yourself and show your feelings damn. That shit is so frustrating!" She yelled like a crazy person.

" I show me feelings all the time with you and my kids. I'm weak for ya'll. But I will not show no emotion for a stupid ass situation when there ain't none to show. Only emotion I got is anger with that shit and I'm not about to express it because I'm not going there with you Pooch. I'm not." I said peeing.

She smacked my dick, making me pee all over the back of the toilet, the walls, and the toilet seat. Who tf does that?

" Clean up my fucking bathroom." She said walking out. " come on Bruce. We going outside for a walk."

I just watched her and Bruce leave out. I didn't move because I'm really not over the fact that her childish ass smacked my dick while I was peeing. I finished peeing and started cleaning the bathroom. She throwing a fit for fucking what?