Therapy: Session 2 [Personal]

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actual conversation i had with dawn today.

(context: i threatened to use the newfound information of who her crush was as leverage)

dawn: "that's not fair! i never should have told you!"

me: "i won't actually do that, you know."

dawn: "no, now i just need to know who you like!"

me: "i'm not telling you that."

dawn: "rock paper scissors for it."

*we play rock paper scissors and i lose*

dawn: "see now you have to tell me!"

me: "i don't have to tell you anything!"

dawn: "do i need to hurt them?"

me: "no! why would you ever need to do that!?"

dawn: "in case they hurt you!"

me: "they didn't hurt me."

dawn: "then why won't you tell me!"

me: "because i haven't told anyone!"

dawn: "does it go against my religion?"

me: "possibly."

dawn: "would we still be friends if you told me?"

me: "i would think so."

dawn: "do i need to hang them by their toes from the flagpole?"

me: "no! my god, what!? no, why would you ever have to do that?!"

dawn: "in case they hurt you."

me: "i've barely even talked to them."

dawn: "or maybe i could hang them by their tongue... or their teeth..."

*i covered my ears and just went STOP STOP AHHH STOP*

dawn: "okay, sorry. i won't do that."

me: "good because i think that's called murder."

dawn: "does your crush meet the requirements?"

me: "well what are the requirements?"

dawn: "gay or nay?"

me: "gay."

dawn: "okay will i still have to hurt them?"

me: "no!"

dawn: "because i will! i'll go right up into her face and say 'if you hurt her i will come to your house and rio out all your teeth with a rusty pair of pliers'."

my band director who was sitting near us: "what are you guys talking about!?"

and thus the conversation ended.

and yes, she is actually that morbid. she literally carries a pocket knife everywhere. i'm slightly afraid that she now knows i'm gay and might treat me differently. but she's sweet. i love her to death and i hope she still cares for me too.