Therapy: Session 2 [Personal]

// 86

you know what's crazy?

how the tiniest of acts can turn around and effect your entire life, and you have no idea.

for example, something i did in fifth grade has led to the thing that makes me so so happy now as a tenth grader.

when i was applying for middle school classes, i took the class theatre arts on a whim because one of my friends said it was cool. i took a theatre arts class in my sixth grade year and i feel absolutely in love with performing and the theatre. after trying out (and failing) to get into two shows in sixth grade, i still took the class again in seventh grade. i also did sets for both plays and loved that as well.

during seventh grade, i took the second theatre arts class while also auditioning for the play. i failed to get into the play, and that destroyed me. but i didn't give up. i let that push me harder in the class, getting better and getting more comfortable on stage. at the end of the quarter in that class, my teacher told me to "keep auditioning". when i moved to my new school, i couldn't do any plays in eighth and ninth grade, but in ninth grade i put the class beginning acting as an alternate for my electives.

i didn't make it into two band classes (thankfully), and was able to take beginning acting in january of this year. i fell further in love with the theatre, and i got a little inside tips from my teacher (the schools theatre director) on a good audition. and then i did it. i auditioned for the school play in january. and i was so close, so so close to backing out from auditioning. but i took a deep breath, thought of my teacher saying "keep auditioning", and did it. and it paid off so fucking well. theatre makes me just as happy as marching band, which i didn't think would be possible.

so yeah, it's crazy how much tiny things can effect you. it doesn't seem like much, that i signed up for that theatre arts class, but it was.

now i'm just trying to imagine what choices are going to effect my future. what choices am i making now that is gonna radically change my entire life in the future? i have no idea.

and yeah, it's terrifying. but it's also so, so exciting.