It's funny when all you want is someone to talk to but you can't get the words out right and you fuck everything up. He was right. He's always been right. Don't deserve love. And will never be loved. But now I see why he said that. I'm an insufferable human being. Is it awful I hope everyone leaves again? Is it awful that I want to be alone? Because then, that way, I won't have to worry about saying the wrong things. I won't have to worry about who would give a fuck if I died or not. Which, at this point, I'm not sure anyone does. But it's okay. Maybe one day I'll get up the courage to take care of it. Maybe one day I'll be just fine with leaving. Maybe one day I won't have to feel this way anymore. Maybe.
