Light. Whether it be a house light, a flashlight, or natural light, we all know what the hell light is. Physical light, anyways. But what about the light inside of people? The way someone's eyes light up when you give them a gift, or when they look at someone they...well. You get the point. I never say the word. Not in my personal writings anyways. Why write about something you don't believe in? Anyways, light. It comes from joy and happiness and being around people who care for you, or that you care for. I believe i am I light. Sometimes. Lights are people who will die before they watch someone they care about, hurt. Or be hurt. They will hurt themselves to protect others. And sadly, that's me. I do what I can, I guess. If I can prevent pain from my family, or my friends, I do. I go out of my way to keep everyone happy and that is what makes me happy. Here we are again, talking about hapiness. But, this is a little different. Is it wrong of me to feel selfish for wanting to try and make my own happiness? I'm tired of depending on other people and I'm tired of being strong for everyone else and fighting for everyone else, and not have anyone fight for me. Any girl will tell you, it's nice to be fought for. We don't say it out loud. And a lot of us don't believe it. But deep down, it's nice to be fought for. Whether a friendship, a relationship, or even just to talk. Its nice to feel like someone is putting effort towards you. Is it wrong for me to want that? Every time I want to do something for me, I feel like I'm being selfish. Every time I have something exciting going on, it's "Cool."
"Okay, and?".
"How does this affect me?".
Now, that doesn't go for everyone. I have one person who hypes me up. And that's really refreshing. Its nice knowing I have at least one person in my corner. But here's the problem. I don't just get attached romantically. If I have one person who is kind to me, and who helps me and makes me feel good about myself, I get attached platonically. I'm clingy with my friends. And that's some bullshit actually. So platonically, I have someone fighting for me ? In a way ? I guess ? But...is it wrong to want something more along the lines of romantically?
