I am struggling. With my job, with keeping up my social life and with the relationship or whatever you would call it. I tell myself every day that tomorrow will be better or that I've just got to get through this little roadblock in my way and yet every day I continue to get worse. I'm drowning in stress and honestly I just need a vacation. Away from my family and my job. Just for a day. I was gonna ask if he would want to go do something just us for a whole day when I get the money. Maybe we could go to the zoo. Maybe we just go to dinner and stay in bed all day and watch movies and cry over the sad parts and laugh over each other's bullshit. Just one day where I can feel at peace with not only myself but with the world. I only seem to feel at peace with him. Sometimes the stress overwhelms me and I lash out unreasonably. I've got to stop doing that shit. But I think it would be nice either way. Just a full day of us doing dumb shit and taking pictures and making memories. It would ease my stress and possibly make us stronger ? I don't know. I'm scared to ask. Money is tight. I'm always tired and his life doesn't revolve around me, which ,of course ,it shouldn't. I still think that the thought that maybe one day we will be able to go do something like that without any worries is what's keeping me motivated. The money is good. The plans for our future is even better. But the memories we will make are what's best about it.
