Wicked | Brendon Urie X Reader

-19-

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-19-

You've Forgotten Who You Are.

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                 As his hand falls from your face, you feel a shadow looming over yourself as well. You quickly whip around to see Brendon's eyes boring into the back of your skull. A face of anger is wiped across is and contorted with frustration.

"What the fuck are you doing with him," he growls out lowly.

You sigh as you look at him and step forward, "Oh shut the fuck up Brendon. You know why."

He huffs and crosses his arms across his chest like a little kid, "So you found out I guess."

"I did. And ya know what? It fucking sucks. It really does. I thought that maybe there was an ounce of good in you and I was wrong. It's not in you, it's out of you and stuck in a fucking piano. Can you fucking understand this madness? I feel like I can't some days Brendon. You have a demon in your house, you have a brother who is out to kill you, you have an uncontrollable beast inside you which I can only guess is from you not having the good part of you in your soul, and oh yeah, that! When does this shit stop? I thought if I was gonna be stuck here like this, you would put a bit more fucking effort into making life normal for me," the words spill out of your mouth in a storm. It's obvious that you're through with this ongoing madness, the mood swings, and everything with it.

His face saddens quickly as he processes it, "Yeah I've got it. I'm a fucking monster. I'm aware you know. I fucking told you too. Everyone told you. They all told you how I was. They didn't go into why because I didn't want you to know. I thought you'd listen to me."

"I did!" you cry out, "Out of fear! Out of shame! Out of feeling of obligation! Yet it didn't do me any good! Nor did it for you obviously."

             You run your fingers through your hair with a stressed pull, biting your tongue to keep from saying something else that might hurt him more. Though you know he's already realized it. Seen inside your head.

"I don't know why I can't fix it ya know?! I keep making these mistakes with you and it's been 7 months. I've tried and tried. I've kept you from your family and even your 22nd birthday! I didn't even celebrate that with you! I've fucked over so much... I don't know how to fix it..." He breaks down, his body slowly falling apart among itself.

"Then take him back."

                Your turn around to see the good part of Brendon sitting back on the stool, staring at his lap as if to keep from it all. His head perks up when you say him and you see their eyes meet. The dark black ones to the lighter, brighter, loving ones. It almost makes you sad to look at them both like this, but you know it's for the best.

"Go get Gerard for me then please."

             You follow his order instant and dash out of the room as fast as you can. You can't wait to get to know the true and real Brendon. What could be better than the true him? The one with all the colors, who isn't just black and white. One that isn't going to kill you every moment of the day or try to cuddle you every second of the year.

                   You meet the library soon enough, a bubbling fire erupting through you of excitement. You'll get to know the man who Sarah loved, the man who everyone loved. Though once you slam through the oak wood doors, the view of Ryan moves into view as well. His head of brown locks peaks over the top of the chair that you usually sit in, with the rips from Brendon.

                  You sigh lowly as you finally meet the side of the chair where he sits. His head is stuck in a little leather journal that his pen write across. Your furrow your eyebrows as you see the name Ryden written across it with a heart beside it, but then marked out and trashed away with the word 'lie and deception.'