Titania's Love Story

Chapter 8: Hurt

Everything was going so well during the summer in August everything was planned and I had to prepare for school coming up but then when letrice texted me that Matt was going to England I was hurt for second but after wards was pissed cause of his parents was making him. A few weeks passed when I was in school he texted me breaking his fathers wishes. 'Bad boy much' I thought and chuckled losing the bet to letrice. Weeks passed as I told him that I didn't have my Instagram on my phone anymore I told him to make a wattpad account and he did then letrice texted me on wattpad first before he did then eveytjing went well. Months later finding out his brother and his ex crush was there with him was gonna be hell. During November my friend rose gave me her back up phone which I needed and I texted him on thst ever since had the apps that had on my phone and some that I had long ago and been keeping it for months now, it was a blood bath going on and off with Matt cause things keep happening. By new years I kept him then made a promise and everything went well after that. But now since it's February I was dissapointed that he missed our first anniversary and valentine's together then he made it up to me as I was filled with joy, but I knew its gonna be fucked up on the weekend he got drunk and and said rude things ans I called it a night. I woke up in the middle of the night and stayed up half of the morning in my time also his since time zones was different and he spammed me and I told him he fucked up big time. I kept my promise to him no more lies and hiding, then we role played and gotten to knew each other a bit more learning each others past I was shoched on what he told me. I giggled at a few but that's bout it then last night he made a new chapter to his story got me blushing hard and everything. Then I saw his new this morning morning, it broke my heart didn't know if it was from past or now but reading it looked like it was now cause he did got into a fight with the bitchs dad and working from home. Seeing the hell she said made my blood boil, saying I keep hurting give me a break how many times he hurted me to many times cause for me he let shit happen at time and that's also on my oart so it's both and in the past I hurted him and he hurted me so it's even. Yea I did a few things that I should go to my boyfriend bout when I'm horny but I don't do that anymore. He keep wondering why I keep leaving think bout it, I have school, walking home to school and back home I don't feel the vibration on my ass when I'm walking. I have fucking classes and class work to do and some shit at home! This isn't summer I try to give my attention to him but he needs to realize that I have things to not just him. I keep in mind that he's busy and got work to do has, meetings, school and all that and I wait for him longer then he waits for me. I keep in mind if a lot of things, when he's busy I get bored in class I go to Instagram or go speak to my friends in rhe group chat then I see his response. The connection are my school sucks and it takes longer to respond at time or when I'm doing my class work. In the past I fucked my friend through a roleplay not in real life that would real fucked up, but then he told me if I screw up the last chance he gave me we're not getting back together, looking back of how much he's done and I forfave him and I didn't mind waiting for his ass to respond I get it hes slow at times but he shouldn't be mad at me for leaving when I have something to do and that's not what the fuck kikyo says. I was hurt reading his new chapter and texted him but nothing I don't expect him to reply sooner but knowing kikyo and I we both hate each other. Plus knowing her she tries to get what she wants but I'm not letting that happen. I keep tryin to tell myself I need to die but Matt won't let me cause he needs me and that's true I need him also. Then I heard my heart agreeing.

'It's been like this for almost a years now you stayed true to yourself and forgave this men for so long and gave him a lot of chances and been through a lot reading his new chapter made you think back and want to go away'

That was my heart telling me agreeing for the first time no one knows what the hell I been through but me I've been hurt and played for so many hears and my dark side wanted someone to feel the same pain that I felt but I wouldn't use anyone hurt yes but using not in my nature and never has been. Him and I go at it a lot hurting each other and one of us realize it one of us don't. He's a baka at times and so can I. What hurts the most is that i never truly had a boyfriend who stuck with me for a long time and he has. What's the point of love when there's no pain or suffer got thar from a song and it's right love is painful but we both took the risk , I rather not end up like my parents not talking to each other. My brother and friends keep telling me to leave Matt for the shit him and I been through or what he done and I can't let him go and keep saying no. People can change I chsmged year's ago when I was a rebel to a sweet angel. Half of everyone takes my sweer side as a weakpoint and use it to hurt me. And it made me wonder bout Matt at everything we been through I get pissed off , hurt and happy but I've stook by his side all this time fighting for him and so much more, writing poems for him, finding songs, drawing for him, showing my love to him. And for the first time my mind and heart was one the same page.

'Does he even truly love me? Even tho I kept hurting him , he still loves me and he does the same but does he truly love me.. Once he side he wouldn't take me forgranted cause for what I am he only saw my sweet side not my dark side, I do everything for him. But only one he showed his love for me and thst was him making up valentine's and first anniversary together thst bout it but other times I fight for him to keep him, and showing me love daily.....he never does that, he never fought for me... '

As it was true my heart beat is telling me to put him in trail cause what he does hurts me then it does to him a lot more. Makes me think why does everything have to happen to us..