Unstoppable

The Twenty-Eighth

Well, here I am again. In this... place. I wonder if this is heaven. I mean, it could be hell too, but I'll take anything over life. Anything over dying, again and again. Is it even worth getting back up again? I could stay asleep, forever and ever, if I just kept killing myself. Maybe that's the idea. It's a good one, I can say that much. Maybe I just don't appreciate life because it's being taken from me. What's the point in settling down if I'm going to live forever? I'm sure there must be someone who has this power, but I'm sure I'll never find them. My guess? They're probably trapped in a coffin somewhere, sleeping for an eternity. I wish I was asleep forever too...

Why didn't my parents have this power? Why couldn't my parents do this stuff? If they could, they'd still be alive, and I could talk to them. Ask them what the fuck I should do. Tell them I really am terrified. I'm terrified of what will happen to me if I don't run fast enough, or jump far enough, or just don't do enough. Am I torturing myself?

Sometimes I really scare myself. It's terrifying. The only thing that scares me more than anything else right now? Whatever the fuck emerged out of Poppy. What was that..? It's... it's eating me. God, that's a horrible thought. I really horrible thought. I'm not coming back to life, as that... What was it? Oh, some sort of liquid. Some sort of liquid would wash over me, and if anything was caught in it, then I'd die. Well, I don't think those claws are going to retract out of my lungs, so it's over.

I wish I could smile. God, I'd be smiling now. It's such a wonderful feeling, knowing that when you die, your dead. Ah, please. Take me, whatever it is that creates us. Please, allow me to let go of my worries. Allow me passage. Whether it be a good or bad place, it's better than whatever I could imagine.
The darkness started to lift, ever so slightly.
Wait... wait, wait wait...
The impassable blackness was slowly starting to light itself.
No... you've got to be FUCKING ME! NO!!
Greatness replaced the blackness, and faded patches of white started to appear.
NO!! PLEASE!! NO!! STOP, PLEASE!!! LET ME DIE!
The whiteness finally appeared, and I braced myself, even though I knew it wouldn't hurt. I knew something that would now. I knew something that would hurt till the end of fucking time:
Waking up.

My head felt like a nailed piece of wood as I lifted it, as if it wanted to be heavy and uncontrollable. As I lifted my head up, I realised that the world was cold again. The air seemed to coil around me, providing no release to any sort of heat I had left in me.
O-O-Oh J-Jesus-S-S
The world was so dark, I couldn't even see my body. I tried to move to see if I could find a light, before realising I was tied down. Again. For the third time.
No, I can't be back here... I was in fucking pieces! THERE WAS A HOLE IN MY FUCKING CHEST! SOMETHING WAS EATING ME!!
A few white noises were heard from behind me as something unseeable continued to make distractions.
Callum was right about something, I'm really tired.
I strained against the ropes, or metal, or whatever bonded me to this chair. My body threw itself around, trying to rock it, but it seemed like it was cemented into the floor, legs slowly being sucked into the floor.
G-g-god... it's f-f-fucking-g c-c-c-cold-d-d
A light source suddenly flashed itself in front of me, just far enough for me to see it took some time to get to, but not far enough for me to realise that I couldn't get to it now. Hope rekindled itself in my body, and that fire was lit very very quickly.
Hold on... Just a little while longer...
The light seemed to snap itself out as I watched it, folding in and collapsing like a deck of cards. The sudden darkness that surrounded it almost comforted me, in a mysterious, 'I'm-also-hidden' way. Maybe, if they weren't careful, I could undo my hands... in some way. I tried to move them around, even just a slight bit, but no amount of pushing against the strong bondage would do. It simply stuck me in place, an annoyed child, refusing to do anything I wish it to. I tried my legs next, and achieved the same response: refusal. I must've spent around fifteen minutes trying to wrangle myself out into the darkness, but to no avail.
Who the fucks in here with me?
I mean, it couldn't hurt to ask.
"H-hel-el-l-o-o?" I managed to chatter out into the darkness, meaning for it to be a greeting. It probably sounded like a door closing. Or a dying animal.
"Ooo! 'Allo!" I heard how familiar voice I distinctly couldn't forget.
There's no fucking way... no way in all hell... fuck off.
"Fancy meetin' you 'ere?" I heard his accent cut through the darkness like paper or tissue. The sudden change of tone almost made me happy. This guy is a human. There is a human here with me. I am not alone.
"It's f-fu-fuck-kin-g freez-zing..." I managed to chatter out, before I heard a guffaw or a laugh emerge from in front of me.
"Ah... yer get used to 'at, eventually." He sighed a bit as he seemed to wipe a tear away from his eye, stopping to sniffle a bit.
"Been down 'ere often, and, 'at this point, so 'ave you." Suspense creeping ominously into his voice. I allowed it to hang momentarily in the air, a spider waiting for a target, before I answered it.
"W-w-wh-wh-What is gon-na hap-ap-apen to m-me?" I asked him, hoping for a straightforward answer to give.
"Ah, well, 'yer probably gonna die." Blunt and true, but I'm glad I got an honest answer. It was no use explaining to this guy I couldn't die. I could already feel like that wouldn't go down well. So, instead, I settled back in my chair, listened to the ominous creaks and groans of the white noise around me, and said, without chattering once:
"Good."