Silent But Sinister//COMPLETED✔️

XXXIII - Quiet

I've been walking for what felt like hours.

And I'm pretty sure it has been since the sun had already set and was now replaced with the moon.

My feet started aching awhile ago, so now my heels were dangling from my fingers as I walked down the pavement of the road. Soldier had been by my side this whole time, and I don't even know how to thank him for sticking by my side. I still refuse to believe he's a dog.

I've been left with my thoughts - and a gingerly panting dog - ever since I ran from Kai. After I told him I couldn't trust him, I ran. I ran as fast as I could in my six inch heels and to my surprise, it was pretty fast. I even got a quick head start since he was still frozen in his spot but I didn't care, I couldn't care right now.

I've been caring for so long, it felt abnormal for me to suddenly stop and not give a single fuck in the world. But for some reason, I liked this feeling. I liked feeling hollow inside and I liked not worrying about the needs of other people. It gave me more time to think of myself and you could call me selfish, but like I said, I don't care.

I guess I've realized that I've only been disappointed so much because I care too much and now that I don't, I felt relief lift itself off my shoulders. I didn't care about making people happy and I didn't care enough to satisfy anyone anymore, I only cared about satisfying myself. I promised myself that I would have to focus on keeping my gang and businesses steady until I can finally destroy Uncle Amethyst and Emerald. And guess what? I don't even fucking care if they died.

I didn't care when I killed my father, so why start caring now? It was completely useless since they seemed to not give a flying fuck about me but it's okay, likewise. Hell, all I know is that I'm going to take them down, just ten times harder than they want to take me down. I'm not going to be merciful, not even show the slightest bit of emotion as they did me. Nah, fuck that shit.

After realizing that it was finally time to get home, I pulled out my phone and instantly regretted it when I did.

413 unread messages, 328 missed calls.

They were all from the guys but most of them were from Kai. But did I care enough to call him back or even glance at the messages? Nope.

I rolled my eyes in annoyance and pressed the button on Soldier's collar for Joe and Richard to pick me up. Thinking of my commands, I couldn't help but replay the words that Richard had said when he was drunk.

"Diamonds, just please don't lose yourself."

But I'm not losing myself Richard, I'm improving. Isn't this what my mother wanted? For me to be happy and move on from her death? To never let her death stop me from moving forward? I honestly think I should be getting a fucking reward for how long I've put up with my emotions, that shit was just out of control.

But now? I don't feel anything but hollowness.

I saw a pair of headlights in the distance and watched as the car came to a stop in front of me. Joe jumped out of the car and swept me into his arms as Richard followed in tow.

"Honey! You had us all worried!" Joe exclaimed in relief.

Worried? They really need to stop feeling so concerned for me because I feel absolutely fine. It feels like I can never even take a step without all of the guys biting their nails or running their hands through their hairs nervously. All they do is worry about me, don't they get tired from caring so much? Because I know I did.

Joe set me down and then it was Richard's turn to lift me off my feet and spin me around in joy, "I'm so glad you're safe," he sighed.

God, will they ever stop treating me like I'm some baby?