Another night I laid awake. Having to work at 3am still haven't slept in awhile. Can't get anything off my mind. My dad, my mom, and everything all at once. I can't keep stressing over all of this. I can't handle the fact both my parents might be gone forever. Both so delusional they can't see they are hurting their daughter. Sitting in the parking lot at work wondering when it's all gonna end. The music doesn't help anymore. The friends can't help anymore. Only thing I can do is sit and pray. Holding onto the one thing that's there for me. You guys. Granted I know like 3 of you. But writing and telling you guys all of this makes me feel better. I don't see how it does but it makes me feel like someone is listening to me. Fuck, please make this go away. I just want to go home. Home where my heart is. The house I grew up in. The house that now i can't even recognize. My childhood gone. I remember when my uncle put me on his dirt bike and I went right through the middle of the trampoline. When me and my cousins went riding. When I smiled and it was legit. When I could go ask my mom to go to the store with me and it felt right. Where I could show her all my cakes I made at work and she'd brag about how good I am to her friends at work. All I ever wanted was a relationship with my dad like that. Tell him my struggles about those boys who hurt me. Have him protect me. Something I never did have.
Sorry this ones kinda all over. Just can't write enough to get this stress off my chest. I hope you guys are having a good day/night. I'm sure as hell trying to. ❤️
YOU ARE READING
New Struggles
PoetryJust some entries, some poems, some just plain feelings and rants about things that are going on in my life. I hope you can relate to my struggles, understand that you're never alone. *Will be updating everyday! I might miss a day though, I'm not pe...
