(2) Self Harm, Depression & The Janoskians

Chapter 45

"She's not ill, I can take care of her." I spoke to the doctor quietly outside of Aprils room.

"Sir, she's been in hospital more than once with related issues-"

"She's fucking fine. She's coming home with me, got it? Now leave us be. She will be ready in a second."

"But sir-"

"I said fucking no! Can't you hear me?" I felt bad screaming at someone who just wanted to help, but I couldn't help but become frustrated when they said that April was mentally ill. They don't know her like I do? She's fine, I'm sure of it. Not a single relapse will change my mind.

April was dressed and ready, her stitched arms making my insides churn. The swelling had gone down slightly and she was ready to now leave. We wasn't going back to the apartment I was taking her straight back to the airport and we was flying back to LA. I had planned for her to come home with me for 3 days, then she would be travelling home to Australia with me.

We got her discharged and ready to leave and exited the building and entered a taxi which was waiting. April hadn't spoken a word to anyone for around a week, since the night of telling her my new plans she had not spoken a word, not to me, or any nurses or doctors. She was in a silent depression, it had eaten her up and I had played a large role in making her like this. No wonder why they think she's mentally unstable when she won't speak to anyone. I grabbed her hand and she held on loosely. "We are going back to LA now April? To see the boys before we go home, okay?" She nodded in reply while staring out of the window. "Are you going to speak to me now?" I asked and she didn't reply.

We drove to the airport and April was quick to grab her own luggage and I was quick to take them off her, I couldn't bare to see her struggling with her bags while her arms were healing. We went through customs and April and I had been receiving crazy amounts of looks, I looked behind and examined April to see why. Her eyes were bland and had black rings circling the rim of them. Her arms were on show and all that could be seen were scars and freshly sliced wounds which were overly obvious they were self inflicted. She looked extremely pale and her lips were slightly cracked. Now I knew why they was staring. But to me, she still looked beautiful.

We sat waiting for our plane and Aprils arms were getting stared at by an older man in front of us. It slightly annoyed me but I pushed it aside.

"Luke!" A girl said to me, I looked aside and I didn't recognise her. "Could I have a photo please." She asked.

I nod and stood up whilst smiling a fake smile at the camera I hugged her and sat down while the girl kept speaking. She kept glancing at April obviously seeing what she had done to herself. "Is this April?" She asked me.

"Yeah, this is April."

"Hello." The girl smiled back at her, April looked at her for a moment and then smiled gently back, but without luck, no reply.

"She's a bit upset. She isn't speaking at the moment." I spoke honestly to the young girl.

"Well, when she does, let her know I said stay strong and that we love her. Just as much as we love you." April shot her a stare after she spoke and stood up. She walked over to her and hugged her and the young girl hugged back.

"Thanks, love." I said to her and she smiled before walking away.

• • • •

We landed in LA and Beau came and picked us up from the airport. The boys knew about everything that had happened and April rushed into him when she saw him and hugged him. They have always had such a close bond, something I didn't have with April from the start, but Beau did. It was nice to see April smile after hours on the flight. She did surprise me with a kiss on the cheek halfway through the flight when she thought I was sleeping, she clung to my hand the whole way back too.

We arrived home and April hugged all the boys then took herself upstairs and went to sleep, I stood with the boys in the kitchen.

"When do you think she will pipe up? Why hasn't she been speaking?" Daniel asked.

"I don't know. I really don't understand it. All I know is the doctors said she just is blocking a lot out." I replied.

"I fucking hate this. Why did this have to happen? Now Lindsay's in fear again, even though he's been arrested. She thinks Aprils dad has people looking for April for him." Beau said.

"I know." I agreed.

"But you don't really do you, Luke? I mean you are sending her back to Australia in a few days." Jai spat.

"She needs to be with Lindsay." I defended myself, which came to them all sighing and not replying to my comment.

"Go and check on her." Beau demanded.

I nod and made my way upstairs. I walked through the corridor and into my room, April was fast asleep clung to a pillow which she also rest her head upon. I walked over to the bed and kissed her forehead before laying beside her, just glaring at her upmost beautiful face.

• • • •

Sorry have been so busy!

Make sure you all comment!