HER (GirlxGirl) [Completed]

Chapter fifty six: Demolish

Trigger warning*

It was a nightmare.

Nothing but a terrible nightmare.

It had to be, right? This couldn't be real. It was all a terrible dream and when I woke up.. everything would be the same.

But it wasn't.

When I woke up the next morning, reality hit and I was stuck in this twisted fucking reality. I didn't even want to get out of bed. I just wanted to stay there forever and not live life anymore.

When Cameron left, my whole world shattered around me. My heart was broken and not only because she left, but the fact that I thought I actually had a chance at not screwing this shit up finally.

I was wrong.

I stayed in that position until Jace came home. He asked what was wrong as he rushed to me and held me in his arms. I didn't say anything as I just cried more and more, not knowing how to stop.

I was numb from the world around me.

I had to tell him the truth. I told him everything and not once did he blame me for murdering Daniel. I told him every detail and he finally figured out why I was hanging out with Cole that day.

Never did I want to murder Daniel. I didn't want him dead, but it was in the moment thing and Cole panicked then pulled the trigger.

Now we're living with the consequences and it's just a matter of time until Cole turns me in by ratting me out. There's no way he would say it was all his fault when it was mine to begin with.

I just didn't know what to do anymore at this point.

I didn't even want to go back to classes. I didn't want to face reality. I just wanted to disappear and never come back.

But of course Jace wasn't going to let that happen. He didn't know how I felt, but he knew the reason. He made me go to classes and made me get out of the house. He told me that if I didn't, then that would be suspicious from all that happened and surely they'd come looking for me.

I listened to him.

Didn't want to but I had to get through this shit somehow. I just didn't want to see Cameron because of what happened. I didn't want to be reminded of the hurt and pain that I felt.

Everything that was my fault. When I saw her, I knew everything was going to be rushed out at once and there was no way for me to stop it. I just didn't want to encounter her, but I had to fight this somehow.

I had to get through.

Putting on a fake smile was a lot easier than I thought. I've did it for years, but this time was a lot different. Even when my mother would beat me to death behind closed doors, I'd go to school like nothing ever happened.

It was too easy for me.

I went by Starbucks and acted like nothing was wrong. I went to class and pretended to be the same person I've always been, but it was hard.

Mr. Thomas did ask about what happened since everyone else knew. He knew I was kind of friends with Cole and I couldn't really tell him the truth. I told him I didn't know he was like that, that's why we never hung out.

He asked about the date this weekend and I had totally forgot to mention it to Jace. I told him it was still going on and he was excited about it.

Leaving his class, my heart was racing when I went to my next one. I wanted to pretend that she was just another woman again, but it was hard seeing her stand up in front of everyone.