Burning Ruins

Chapter Forty Eight

Chapter Forty Eight

Delaney

I stare at the door that was left open and the silence around me filled.

Had I lost him? Or was he always gone? Why didn't he fight? What had I done to make him quit? Why didn't he see what I saw I had to do? Not everything about him? What's been wrong with me?

I closed my eyes and tried to sleep but my mind wasn't tired anymore, I wasn't tired anymore. My mind was simply sleepless.

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"He leaves in the middle of the night, letting me break up with him and he doesn't even fight. It's almost like he was too exhausted to fight for me. I just wanted to feel loved you know?" I looked at Jenna waiting for her to agree but she just shook her head.

"What?" I questioned.

"He's been fighting for you too damn long that he wants you to finally put in the effort." Jenna took a big bite of her sandwich.

"I fight for him." I stated.

"Do you?" Ryan then butted in. "Because I'd always hear him stand up for you, every waking moment of his life. The least you could do was go off with him."

"But he has to understand that my dad and I just got things good." I fought back.

"That's bullshit, you got all your life to fix the boo boo's whats the real reason." Ryan questioned.

"That is the real reason!" I yelled at him then.

"Laney breathe and look around you. We won't judge you. What are you afraid of?" Jenna had her soft spoken voice then and it melted my anger.

She was smarter than I gave her credit for.

"I don't know." I whispered.

"Sure you do."

"I'm scared." I whispered.

"Of what?" Ryan then asked.

"I'm afraid to love him!" I yelled then and I felt the truth slip out of my mouth that I didn't realize that's why I fought around the bush. "It's so easy for him to tell me that he loved me but for me to say it, I don't want to make him wait for me to say it back when I can't."

"Why can't you love him?" Jenna grabbed my hand and I felt the pain crawling inside me.

"What if he hurts me like Hunter did? What if he loves someone else and leaves me? I can't go through that heartache again. Not again Jenna." I whispered then barely audible for me to hear. Every word I said I choked on.

"Look at me Delaney." Ryan then said.

I looked up into his eyes and saw his pain for me.

"I saw Hunter treat you like a load of shit ok, I saw him play with you until he got bored. But with Axel King, the man known for sleeping around with women he treats you a shit ton better than he treated girls in the past. I've never once seen a man stand up for a woman in my life like he does with you. He loves you too damn much to fuck it up now. And if he does stop loving you, he won't be so cold to do it behind your back. He's classy not trashy."

"Don't let what you think you need to fix here keep you away from the man of your dreams. Don't allow your fears to swallow you whole Delaney. Listen if I'm having another baby then you need to face your own fear and love Axel. He would do just about anything for you. You need to be there for him, even through the worst. He saved you, it's your turn to help him get back up." Jenna squeezed my hand and I looked up and saw my dad standing by the stairs and nodded.