Dead Inside

47.

Entity Steve had been quite jumpy ever since they left that morning from their makeshift camp. He would easily get startled from any sudden noise made, and when it fell quiet, he was always on edge. Sabre kept thinking Entity Steve would bail out on the idea of this journey, to find his friends to save the undead lives of his other friends and defeat Forest Steve before things get worse than they already are; But Entity Steve never spoke up. 

The group had found two of Portal Steve's friends, Green Steve and Entity Steve. Now all they had was Dust Alex, Blue Alex, and Bright Steve to go. Who knew how long that would take, though.

"Wait," Portal Steve stopped, squinting his eyes as he stared into the distance in front of them. "We're nearing a desert. Dust Alex could be there."

Green Steve motioned his hands in reply and Portal Steve sighed. 

"I know she'll be hard to find," Portal Steve told him. "But we have to at least try! Lives are at risk."

The group didn't argue as Portal Steve led them closer to this desert he had mentioned. It wasn't long before Sabre spotted the sandy edge of the desert. It looked vast, and quite hot. He was worried they may get lost there, or get dehydrated; he knew none of them brought water bottles. Who would be crazy enough to live somewhere as terrible as a lonely, boiling desert in the middle of nowhere? Apparently Dust Alex, whoever she was. 

Before long, they were walking on the burning sand of the desert. The sun was bearing down on them, the intense heat causing sweat to run down the side of Sabre's brow. He wiped his forehead and continued on, following Portal Steve with the others close behind him. 

"We have to stick together," Portal Steve told them. "It's easy to get lost in places like this."

"Yeah," Rainbow Steve muttered. "Thanks for the warning." There was a warning in his tone, like he was beginning to get annoyed with Portal Steve's remarks. Sabre thought it was just the heat getting to him. 

As the friends continued on, passing very few dead bushes and cacti, Sabre could tell the heat was getting worse as if telling them there was no escape. Galaxy Steve was dragging his feet and looking as if he could collapse at any moment, Alex at his side who was trying to block the sun with her arm. Rainbow Steve had to stop a few times to catch his breath and Blue Steve's eye-color had begun fading. Green Steve looked strong but couldn't hide the tired look in his eyes, and Entity Steve had become even more edgy than before, including the fact that he fell a few times from exhaustion. Sabre felt bad for them, especially Blue Steve; He knew Blue Steve wasn't used to extreme heat such at this, and it was bad for him. Blue Steves were used to humid, wet areas with plenty of water. The desert isn't the place for a Blue Steve. They had to find shade, and fast, before Blue Steve passed out. 

Something fast passed by, causing sand to cloud the area where it ran. Entity Steve jumped, his eyes wide. 

"What was that?" he questioned, his voice a quiet squeak. 

"It was probably a roadrunner," Portal Steve replied with a shrug. "Just ignore it, we don't have time to look at animals. We have friends' lives to save."

Entity Steve wimpered slightly, but didn't argue as the group continued onward. He stayed close to Green Steve's side, speckles of dust across his glasses but didn't bother to blow them off. Now the heat was unbearable. Galaxy Steve finally dropped to his knees and Alex stopped to lean on her own knees, placing a hand on Galaxy Steve's back. Rainbow Steve wiped his forehead tiredly and Blue Steve staggered slightly as if trying to stay conscious, Green Steve and Entity Steve stopping to sit and rest. Sabre turned to Portal Steve, his throat too dry to swallow. 

"We need shade," he said. "And water. We won't last long out here like this."

Portal Steve froze, staring out in the distance. After a long, silent moment, he spoke. "I know, and I'm sorry I brought you into this." he turned to face Sabre. "If anything, I'll be the one to blame if we don't get out of here alive."

"What do you mean?" Sabre questioned. 

"I mean," Portal Steve closed his eyes. "I'm a terrible person to follow. I'm leading you into such danger without thinking; It's what I've been doing for years. You can blame me if we die here, and I'm fine with that." he lowered his voice as if he were talking to himself. "Why was I such a fool. I can't do anything right!"

"That's not true!" Sabre insisted. "Your helping us, all of us, to save so many lives; including mine. Your trying your best, and that's what matters."

"No," Portal Steve opened his eyes, a strange and unusual emotion flashing in them. "No, no, no. You don't understand! I've been helping you and Emburn for so long, and the truth is, I'm only doing it to make up for what I have done many years ago. I care about you and Emburn and all my other friends, I really do, but sometimes I think- What if all this is wrong?"

"Stop it," Sabre grasped Portal Steve's shoulders. "What's going on?"

Portal Steve looked away. "I think you may have to go on without me. If anything, just forget about me, completely. I've been terrible, a terrible friend."

"How so?" Sabre asked, a bit surprised. "How are you so terrible? You sure don't seem terrible to me, at all! Your one of my friends, Portal Steve."

Portal Steve shook his head. After a moment, he looked at Sabre, grief, pain, anger, and guilt in his eyes. "I was Forest Steve's right hand Steve."