Only Us (Justin Fields)

|9| That Should Be Enough

Jillian

I never thought that watching a flower grow would mean so much to me. But the lilies I planted have been blooming pretty quickly, even with the winter. I keep it by the window for sunlight and water when I'm supposed to. The only problem is this flower was starting to get too big for its pot. It's grown in both beauty and size in the short time I've had it. The roots are expanding and they don't have any place to do so.

No one should be told they cannot grow.

So I decide to go to Target and look for a new pot. Some fresh soil and a spray bottle too. I take my little cart around and waste some time. I don't get out often and there aren't many people here so I was comfortable enough to stay out for a little while longer.

Suddenly my phone goes off and I see the only person that ever seems to call me pop up on the screen.

"Good morning Justin" I answer.

"Hey Lilly, what are you up to" he wonders. I pick up a new phone case and take a long look at it. I didn't need a new one but this one was pretty cool.

"I'm at Target. The lily I'm growing is getting too big so I'm buying a new pot" I explain.

"Look at you, you're really committed to this" he teases.

"What can I say? The burden of a life, even a small one, can still weigh a lot. Sometimes it's the smallest things that end up taking up the most space in this world. Like the ever growing roots to support the flower even though you can't really see them" I say.

"I'm so proud of you" he claims.

For a moment everything stops. The lights dim and the voices fades. I nearly drop the phone case I had been looking at. For whatever reason hearing those words sent chills through my entire body. Not once in my life has someone said they're proud of me. And I don't need reassurance but to finally hear it, and to hear it from him, it truly meant the world.

"You there" he asks when the silence takes over the call.

"Yeah. I'm right here" I assure him.

"So where are you going to go when you leave Target" he questions.

"I think I'm going to hang around here a little while longer. There's not many days I leave my apartment besides for class. I don't shop often so it's nice to look around. Even if I don't end up getting it" I say finally putting back the phone case I was looking at.

"Why don't you treat yourself" he suggests.

"I'm not one to splurge. I've never had a lot of money but I've always been responsible with it. I know how to save and do what I can with what I have. My college and housing is paid for because of grants and scholarships. They eat up that foster kid story and wanting to help people in the way I was never helped. It works every time so I guess this awful situation I'm in does have a few perks. I was in the workforce for a while so I saved up and I live a simple life. It's easy to get things when you don't ask for much" I explain.

"Still. There has to be something you want" he tries.

"Honestly... there isn't. The less you want the less you need. Sure it would be nice to have things that weren't there simply for my survival. But I find beauty in simplicity. It allows more room for things like flowers, and you" I explain.

"You deserve so much more. I really hope you know that" he whispers.

"I don't deserve anything. Nothing is owed to me simply because I am here. We get put on this earth and all we do is take. All our resources, our time, our money, we take and we take and we take. What more is there to ask for? I don't want or desire anything because my existence is enough. That's what I deserve. Everything after that should be earned" I say.

"I'm going to have to disagree with you. Because life has given you things but it's taken it too. Far more than anyone should ever lose. Things you will never get back either. So, in the very least, you deserve to treat yourself. Lord knows you would never let me do it" he chuckles.

"That is true" I confess. "I guess I just don't see the point. If I don't need it why should I have it?"

"Because you want it. Believe it or not that should be a good enough reason" he insists.

I pick the phone case back up as I stare at it. It was kinda cute. Just a simple black phone case with white and gold marble. But for some reason I couldn't find a good enough reason as to why I would need this.

"What do you want" I wonder.

"To hang out with you today" he claims as I roll my eyes.

"Aren't you like super busy" I ask him.

"Yeah but any reason is a good enough reason to see you" he insists.

"Okay. Wanna do breakfast" I ask.

"Hell yeah. Want to go to that bistro you like" he says.

"Sounds like a plan" I nod.

I toss the phone case into the cart and head to check out. Once I was done I head back home to transfer my flower. There was even some space for a few more of them. They might be in different stages of their lives but that's okay. You should never compare two things at two different places in life anyway.

Once I clean up I shower and change. I head on over to the bistro and find Justin already there. I've never met someone more chronically on time than me until I met him.

I sit across from him and set my phone on the table. He smiles big before picking up my phone.

"Sweet case! Where did you get it" he questions.

"Funny thing, I got it at Target this morning. I wasn't sure about it but now that it's on the phone I really like it" I admit.

"See! There's nothing wrong with a little spoiling every once in a while. It looks good" he claims.

"It is pretty cool" I agree.

"So how is your flower" he asks.

"Flowers now. And they're good. Got them by the window and I get to keep watching them grow" I smile.

"Good. And that means I get to keep watching you grow too" he insists.