Before you disappear

Chapter 35

Jungkook took a deep breath as he stood in front of the mirror. He'd managed to undress himself until his underwear but had to stop when he spotted himself in the mirror. It wasn't his body in the reflection. It was hers.

How can I look at her, even touch her body, without knowing her?

The thought shook him. Would she have the same thoughts? It might depend on what kind of fan she was. If she was a true ARMY she might have the same thoughts, because BTS and ARMY were respectful towards each other. But if she was a Saesang...

He shivered involuntarily. He shouldn't assume the worst about her. After all, she might think the same of him in her body. She only knew his public persona, not who he was behind closed doors.

Perhaps she's also hesitant about seeing or touching my body as if it's hers.

But it was. Right now, this was his body. It shouldn't matter that the body was female. He still had an obligation to take care of it, perhaps even more so because it wasn't his but hers.

Stop overthinking this, JK. Just undress, and get in the shower.

Without another thought, he removed the rest of his clothes and stepped inside the cubicle. As water touched his skin, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. The water felt good against his sore and tight muscles. This was exactly what he needed.

He opened his eyes, only to get some bodywash, and closed them again before he started washing himself. The unfamiliar parts of her body made him gasp a few times, but he managed to push the resistance away before it was too hard to ignore.

He washed his hair, untangling it with his fingers as his hands slid down to the ends.

A deep sigh left him as he took the shower head from the holder and used it to trace all the lines of his body. Once he arrived at her waist, a strange tingle made him open his eyes instantly.

What was that? It felt nice.

He shook his head.

No. That's not going to happen.

He quickly finished showering and grabbed the towel that hung across the railing on the side of the shower. As he dried his body, he ignored the building resistance of not having been able to talk to her and getting to know her.

What would I have done? Ask her permission to touch her body?

This was a weird and unique situation, no matter how you looked at it. He just had to deal with it the best he could. Stop being weird about it, was step one.

Five minutes later, hair still dripping, he was fully dressed and back in his bed. He'd taken the towel with him, rubbing through her hair to try and dry it.

His eyes fell on the phone on his nightstand. Would she have called again while he was in the shower? He checked, but there were no missed calls.

Anxiety grew inside. Patience never was one of his strong suits, and to be alone with his thoughts in this unpersonal room was slowly getting to him.

How long should I stay here? When can I leave, so I can find my way back to my life?

To help ease his mind, perhaps it would be a good idea to see if he could learn a bit more about her. Check her social media, see who her contacts are. It might also help him keeping up the appearance that he was indeed her.

As he started scrolling through the contact list on her phone, he pouted. She didn't have a lot of people in here. Was she a loner? Or didn't she have a big family, and a lot of friends? Some mentioned a profession or location behind the name: 'dentist', 'hairdresser' or 'gym', but other than that, it was unclear who of these people were friends, family or colleagues.