Before you disappear

Chapter 54

He planned to see a lot of me. Why did that heat up everything inside of me? He couldn't possibly feel the way I did about him, right? After all, he was my bias. An infatuation. Someone I had started loving from afar. I'd seen him on camera with make up and without. I'd seen him in formal and informal settings.

But he hadn't seen any of that from me. How could he possibly feel the same about me as I did about him?

I shook my head, pulling myself back from cloud 9. I needed to keep my head straight. He probably said that because he was curious about me. After all, we did spent 10 days in each other's bodies, so wouldn't it be logical that when you share such an unique experience, that you'd want to be around each other? No one would understand what we went through except he and I.

So, every decision he had made, all the things he had said, weren't meant in a romantic way.

I have to stop thinking of him like that.

But to be honest, I wasn't sure if I could. Beside the fact that he was still my bias, I couldn't shake my love and infatuation for him. Even in the little time I had spent with him, nothing in the way he behaved himself had made me change my perception of him. If anything, it actually enhanced my feelings. Possibly also because having him in my vicinity spiked my heartrate automatically. He didn't even have to do anything, but have those beautiful brown doe eyes look at me.

Stay calm, I told myself. He's just a normal man. Breathtakingly beautiful, yes. But still normal.

In order to get my mind off Jungkook and the way he made me feel, I turned towards the bag Sehun had brought.

When he brought me to this room, he'd asked what I needed. "I'll make sure to get what you need for tonight and tomorrow, so you won't have to leave the hotel right away."

Going through my usual night and morning routine in my head, and checking the bag that Jungkook had packed when he was still me, I came up with just a few things that I'd need. Though when Sehun asked about the clothing situation, I hesitated.

"This is the only set of clothes you have?" he had asked, pointing at the clothes I was wearing.

I had checked my bag again, noticing it only contained a sweatpants and shirt. They were perfectly comfortable for snuggling up inside, but I always hated wearing something like this when I went outside.

"I suppose I can wear this outfit tomorrow," I had tried. "And then buy a new outfit."

But Sehun seemed to see right through me and offered to buy me a new outfit, so I didn't have to wear these clothes outside. 

Truth be told, I didn't want Sehun to have to find clothes for me. I always had a hard time finding clothes that fit. My hour glass figure was something most women were jealous of, but those same women didn't seem to understand that having the proportions I had, meant that finding clothes that fit was quite the hassle.

Mosts pants would fit perfectly around my thighs, but almost never fit at my waist as it was too wide on top. Same with shirts; if one hugged my chest perfectly, they would be too tight around my hips, making me feel bloated and unattractive. So, I usually wore shirts that were too wide up top, but sat comfortably around my hips.

I sighed, remembering the look Sehun had given me as I had tried to decline his offer.

"I'm just a bit insecure about clothes, that's all," I confessed. "And having a man pick out my outfit feels a bit... weird?"

"Would you feel better if I asked one of the female staff to accompany me?" he had asked. "Our stylist Hye-Jin is very skilled in finding perfect outfits. She only needs to take a look at someone and she'll know what size they are and what would fit them best. I'm sure she'll get a great outfit for you, so you'll have a fresh set of clothes for tomorrow."

With my hesitant nod, he had taken his phone out of his pocket, called Hye-Jin and asked her to come over now.

Within two minutes, a bright-eyed, cheerful Korean lady - who I guessed couldn't be older than 25 - had come over to my room. After being briefed by Sehun, she had sized me up and then promised to find the perfect outfit ánd keep my presence hidden from the rest of the crew.

"I'll go check the stores right away. Sehun, meet me in the lobby in 1 hour? I'm sure I'll have something by then." Then she had turned to me, giving me a smile that brightened the whole room. "I'll come by tomorrow morning and see how they fit, okay?"

I must've nodded, but looking back I wasn't sure. Hye-Jin had left the room as quickly as she came.

As I looked at the bag Sehun had brought, I wondered what outfit Hye-Jin had found for me.

The only clothes I knew for sure would fit, were A-style dresses. At least with a dress I could cover up the areas that I felt insecure about. Would Hye-Jin have thought of that? Or would she have bought a pants and shirt, thinking that would fit also?

I took a deep breath as I sat down, opened the bag and started laying out the contents on the coffee table before me. There were the basic essentials, like a toothbrush, toothpaste, hairbrush and facial cleanser, and make-up like mascara, foundation and a peach and pink colored lip gloss.

I took out a separate bag and in it, I found the set of clothes Hye-Jin must've picked out for me. The main color was a striking ocean blue but as I took the fabric out, I noticed a subtle pattern of sea shells in a softer blue tone, and little oily pearls in around the neck and waistline.

I stood up, holding the fabric against my body.

Hye-Jin had picked out a dress. A sea themed A-line dress with a carmen neckline and a flowing skirt that fell down just over my knees.

Walking towards the closet, I took out one of the hangers and hung the dress on it.

My throat tightened as I looked at the dress. It was so beautiful and.. so me. How had Hye-Jin done such a good job? Sehun hadn't overreacted; she really was gifted when it came to clothes and finding the right outfits.

In the bag, I also found a darker colored blue short vest and a pair of high heels, in the same blue color, with a little seashell hanging on the outside side.

I hung the vest on the same hanger as the dress, noticing instantly how well the color matched with the dress, and placed the shoes on the ground beneath it.

The outfit was drop dead gorgeous and just perfect. My heart started racing as I looked at it. Part of me wanted to try it on right away, but I resisted the urge, knowing full well that Jungkook might come back at any minute.

Opening the closet, I placed the dress and shoes inside and then walked back to collect the items I'd laid out on the coffee table. I brought them into the bathroom, deep in thought on how the dress would look and if I wasn't too overdressed when I tried it on.

Then, a faint ringing coming from the seating area pulled me out of my thoughts. Was that my phone?

I hurried to grab my phone, barely registering the caller-ID and picking up without another thought.

"What the hell are you doing?"

***

Author's note

Oh oh... Who could be on the other end of the phone? Any guesses? :)