Forbidden

Chapter 47

Ashley's POV

After Meredith told me that, I didn't hesitate to go and talk to him. How could he still think that after I told him everything is going to be fine. That's not the Hudson I fell in love with.

I stand in front of his room and knock at the door. As he opens, I walk angrily in without saying anything. Hudson probably knows why I'm here because he closed the door and doesn't look very surprised about me showing up angry.

"You really think you need to have something against him to be with me? Can't you just fight as every man would do? Fairly? But you use your sister to get my family to like you more than Kerem? Do you actually love me, or are you just afraid of my brothers hurting you if you leave?" I say angrily and regret some of my questions. They really were mean, but that's what I was thinking and I never say anything if he is just being honest. He looks ashamed but upset at the same time.

"How can you even say that? I do love you. More than anybody else. I know this was a stupid idea of mine, but I want to take it back. Ok, maybe not now but I would've taken it back sometime. I am afraid... afraid of losing you." He says and grabs my hands to make a soft effect of his words.

"So you are not sure about us? Maybe you are fighting but it doesn't seem like it. But be honest... Are you sure you want to marry me?" I say and my eyes get full of tears when I notice him hesitating to my question.

"You want the truth?" He says. I nod because if I spoke then my voice would crack.

"I wasn't sure..." I want to let go of his hands but he holds on more tightly.

"But..! The more I think of a future with you the more I want it. So don't even dare to think I don't love you enough. And if forced or not I still would've married you either way." He says and the tears fall down my cheeks but this time they are tears of happiness. He catches one tear with his thumb and holds his hand on my jaw.

"Why are you crying? I won't lose you."

"You won't ever lose anything because you already won my heart." I say and he hugs me tight. Right after our hug, Meredith opens the door.

"Everything ok?" She asks before she enters the room.

"Yes, everything's fine. Now leave us alone for a moment." Hudson says gruffly and Meredith closes the door again.

We lay down on his bed. Still hugging like we haven't seen each other for years. And we start talking about how our life would be when we marry. As if my family were already agreeing with me and had given us permission to marry.

"How many children would we have?" He asks playfully. I didn't expect him to even ask that. I never knew if he's like to have children or not.

"I don't know. Maybe three?" I say nervously.

"Three? At least two, not more. You probably won't work and watch out for them but I'll be working and you'll have no help. And trust me I won't leave you alone with three children." He protests.

"I am not alone. I have Meredith." I say, proud to have my best friend and sister-in-law.

"Having Meredith to help is like having nothing." He says and I know he's joking.

"Alright, two then. A boy and girl." I chuckle.

"Ok, what do you want first. Girl or boy?" He asks.

"That doesn't matter. I'm happy with either."

"Come on, I know you want the boy to be younger so he can't be so overprotective to our daughter, right?" He says and is right.

"Alright, what'll her name. be?" I ask happily. That would be probably my favorite thing to decide in life.

"I don't know. Maybe something that is beautiful in English and in Turkish too. Like your name." He flirts.

"Aww. Well, I don't know either. What about Suzan?" I say with a Turkish accent.

"You mean Susan?" He asks not liking it very much.

"Yes, but with a Z in the middle."

"No, I have a crazy aunt named Susan and I don't want to remember her every time I call my daughter." He says and I can't hold myself back from laughing hard. He joins me and after a few seconds I've got the perfect name.

"What about Deniz? That means sea in Turkish." I say excitedly.

"Well, in English we say Denise and that would be perfect!" He says and I get so excited I sit up and kiss him without thinking. Like I'm already pregnant or something.

"What was that for?" He smiles at me.

"I would ask the same question..." Amar says at the door.

Oh no!