I personally did not like the title because it is common and lacks creativity. You must add an attractive, unique title to your story which makes your story stand out. Even the title is grammatically incorrect. It will be (Arranged Marriage.) Not Arrange Marriage.
Cover: 3.5/10
Pick the protagonist and edit your cover, if you want all the main characters to be in the cover, it won't look good enough to attract people. Here in Wattpad, attractive covers are more important than a storyline.
Blurb/ Description: 4/10
I'm not interested in reading your story after what you have written in the blurb. It's so boring and not even catchy.
Pace: 3/10
Way too fast changing of events. No proper ending of any incident. You were rushing while writing, is what I observed. Try to stress on maintaining the pace. It helps readers to keep up with the actual flow of the story.
Grammar and Vocabulary: 0/10
I was genuinely disappointed here. The reasons are clear. You need to focus on grammar. You have to make sure to use words which are related, do not use any word in the middle of a sentence just like that.
The following Grammatical errors noticed::
….there sat a girl….
Correction: there was a girl sitting.
…thinking she stood up…
Correction: while thinking something she got up and started walking here and there.
…suddenly a women came…. Correction: suddenly a lady came… (You cannot put 'a' as a prefix to plural words. And 'e' indicate plural in *Men & women*.
After the introduction, there a messy paragraphs which make it very difficult to understand what's happening because you have given asterisks and commas, along with exclamation marks representing nothing but making the whole conversation confusing.
To avoid this uncertainty try to use dialogue tags.
Example:
"Oh my God! What's wrong with my princess?" Mrs. Mehta exclaimed.
"Why are you so nervous?" She questioned her daughter and hugged to comfort her.
"Mom, I'm nervous. What if they don't like me?" I almost whispered to my mother.
Like this you have to continue the process of your writing or else you have to be very careful when you are writing in a script form. You can read some books or play to learn and see how things are written. Then I would suggest you to stress OK your Grammar and sentence construction…which is really an integral part of writing a story in any eventuality.
Characters Development: 2/10
Few character developments were genuinely good in the beginning. Some of the characters are unnecessary, in my opinion. One thing you need to keep inside your mind while writing any story.
1. Lesser characters make a strong plot.
2. Too many characters may destroy a strong plot.
3. Usage of correct and requisite character is very very important.
4. Every character should play an important role which has a connection with the book.
Remember, good placement of characters makes a common plot, interesting . It adds a uniqueness to the story. characters are the important part of your story, they are your strengths and the leader of your imagination. Make them powerful.
Writing style: 2/10
I was confused about your writing style. Which style you were using while writing I didn't get. There are basically 5 types of writing style 1. persuasive 2. narrative 3. expository 4. descriptive 5. script writing
Follow either narrative style or Script writing. Nowadays, everyone Follows narrative style because it is easy to understand and you can express your ideas well through it. I would suggest you adopt it.
Script writing is a bit tough and complicated, not everyone will understand the format, but I am not telling you not to go for it. You can Adopt it only when you are good at it. . It's up to your convenience.
Concept and plot:: 3/10
Too common in wattpad nowadays. I couldn't understand what you tried to write because of how messy the writing is. I really didn't like the concept. Too many characters, too many things going on plus rushy writing.
I would suggest you to go through some books which were originally published. Not only Colleen Hoover…try to read other author's work. It can be Indian authors too. Try to explore different genres, different troupes so that you can get a clear idea how the writing thing actually works.
Hope you will improve in future and will write amazing books.
Overall impression: 2.5 /10
Nothing much to say, follow up what I have mentioned above. It will help you while writing, Keep all the points in your mind.
There is nothing called impossible so I know you will improve. Take my review in a positive manner and we are always here to motivate you all budding writers.
Keep writing and we will keep motivating you. Thank you. Wish you luck.
Rating of the book: 2 /10
Total :: 24/100
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