Hazbin Hotel Group Chat

The Group Expands

(Freaky Face added 3 members to the chat)
Harder Daddy:
... HOW DID YOU DO THAT?
Harder Daddy:
Wait... 3? FUCKING DON'T TELL ME!
Big Ass Forehead:
FUCK YOU ALASTOR!
Daddy Issues:
... That's Vox, isn't it?
Freaky Face:
The one and only...
Piece of Shit:
Ah~ Now I don't have to call. Angel, I need you here in five minutes.
Short King:
... Val I'm assuming? So glad I get to meet you... I'm going to fuck you up.
Danger Tits:
... OH MY FUCKING GOD! HE GOT IT RIGHT?
Harder Daddy:
... FUCK! I'm screwed.
Screen Queen:
... What the fuck do you all want?
Screen Queen:
This name is shit.
Freaky Face:
It's fitting though. All of your names are fitting.
(Short King has banned Piece of Shit from the chat)
Short King:
He shouldn't be a problem anymore...
Harder Daddy:
Did you kill him?
Short King:
... He won't be a problem. End of story.
Big Ass Forehead:
THIS NAME IS NOT FITTING YOU PIECE OF SHIT! FUCK YOU!
Freaky Face:
... It is though.
Screen Queen:
... He's not wrong. LMFAO
Daddy Issues:
@Vagina Where are you?
Vagina:
You won't believe me if I tell you...
STAB:
CLUB MEETING?
Vagina:
... Niffty, no.
Dick Master:
@DangerTits Where the fuck are you?
Danger Tits:
...
Vagina:
... Remember that dream I had?
Daddy Issues:
IT WAS A SIGN? YAY! 😁
Dick Master:
So you're a traitor?
Danger Tits:
... It's not like we're fucking.
Vagina:
I'm already taken.
Whiskers:
@ShortKing So... If Val is dealt with, does that mean you can end contracts?
Short King:
I'm fucking Lucifer. Yes, I can.
Whiskers:
Then... Could I ask you for a favor?
[Freaky Face has muted Whiskers]
Freaky Face:
... No.
Harder Daddy:
First off... Alastor fucking sucks clearly. Second... @ShortKing HOW THE FUCK DO I REPAY YOU?
Pop My Cherri:
... Don't offer to suck his dick. You've done that to several people, but this is the King of Hell you're talking to.
Two Dicks:
... He literally said he'd fuck Adam.
Short King:
Yes, I did say that.
Screen Queen:
OK, but... If you were to do that... It would get so many damn views.
Danger Tits:
Who would be the traitor then @DickMaster? LMAO
Short King:
Exactly. I would only do it if it was consensual.
Dick Master:
SHUT UP!
Pop My Cherri:
... @BigAssForehead has been real quiet this whole time...
Two Dicks:
... No. He's typing.
Harder Daddy:
It's going to be some long ass rant about Alastor...
Screen Queen:
... God, I didn't want to be in this shithole of a chat, but if I screenshot the things that happen in here... It's either good content to post, or blackmail material.
Vagina:
... Blackmail material. Hell yeah!
Daddy Issues:
No... Be nice.
Danger Tits:
She's out having coffee with her literal enemy right now. I think she's been nice enough for today.
Vagina:
Yeah. My kindness has limits. And honestly, we sat here giving each other the death stare for like 10 minutes before starting awkward, but hostile, small talk. LMFAO
Dick Master:
... I kind of wish I was there to witness that.
Big Ass Forehead:
ALASTOR! FUCK YOU! YOU'RE OLD, NOT TRENDY! I'M WITH THE TIMES, BETTER THAN YOU IN EVERY WAY! YOU WERE GONE FOR 7 FUCKING YEARS! WHY WOULD YOU COME BACK? TO TORMENT ME? YOU'RE OBSESSED WITH ME! WHAT? DO YOU WISH TO FUCK OR SOMETHING? I WOULD FUCK YOU IF MY LIFE DEPENDED ON IT! FUCK YOU!
Vagina:
... He's asexual. Why can't anyone respect that?
Screen Queen:
YOU'D FUCK HIM? LMFAO
Big Ass Forehead:
WOULDN'T* TYPO! DON'T SCREENSHOT THAT!
Screen Queen:
Too late.
Freaky Face:
You spent all of that time writing me that message? How thoughtful. Seems like you're obsessed with me. I'm flattered. I'm going to reject your advances though.
Short King:
OK, I try to be supportive and keep up with the Rainbow Mafia but... What's asexual?
Freaky Face:
... I still don't know.
Daddy Issues:
Asexuality is a spectrum, where people feel little to no sexual attraction.
Short King:
So, the opposite of @HarderDaddy? Got it.
Harder Daddy:
... Yeah, he gets it. LMAO
Dick Master:
That's not a thing. It's unnatural.
Danger Tits:
... Would you shut the fuck up?
Vagina:
Holy shit! Unexpected ally? I thought your ass was homophobic.
Danger Tits:
... Because of what I said about your relationship with @DaddyIssues? I said that shit because you're originally from Heaven, and your girlfriend is from Hell. I don't give two shits if your gay.
Daddy Issues:
Still kind of a dick move to say shit about someone's relationship.
Dick Master:
I still think it's hot. Only lesbians though. Fuck the rest.
Harder Daddy:
... Get the fuck out.
Short King:
... I'm going to start hiding rainbow flags in all of the places you go. You wake up... RAINBOW FLAG! You go to take a piss... RAINBOW FLAG! You go to eat something... RAINBOW FUCKING FLAG!
STAB:
Agressive support for the gays?
Two Dicks:
Seems like it.
Vagina:
@DaddyIssues On my way back. We're done with coffee.
Danger Tits:
We both slapped the shit out of each other as we left.
Dick Master:
And I'm going to slap the shit out of you when you get back. Fucking traitor.
Danger Tits:
I will shove a sword up your ass.
Pop My Cherri:
... He might be into that.
[Freaky Face unmuted Whiskers]
Freaky Face:
You may speak now.
Whiskers:
I don't think anyone would be into having a sword shoved up their ass.
Two Dicks:
... I mean, Niffty does enjoy pain.
STAB:
Ew. No. Not like that.
Dick Master:
HELP! SHE ACTUALLY HAS A SWORD!
Short King:
I'm on my way... TO WATCH! HA!
Screen Queen:
@FreakyFace I never thought I'd say this... But thank you for adding us. This is entertaining.
Freaky Face:
I've said the same thing.
Big Ass Forehead:
FUCK YOU ALASTOR!