Hazbin Hotel Group Chat

Children

Harder Daddy:
HELP! I FUCKED UP!
Freaky Face:
What's new?
Harder Daddy:
OK, this is not the time for you to be a fucking dick Alastor. I LOST A CHILD!
Mouth:
Where did you get a child in the first place? Unless, is that code for Niffty?
STAB:
... I'm sitting behind you.
Harder Daddy:
Some random lady asked me to watch her child, AND I LOST IT! I got distracted by an old lady backflipping down the street.
Kayden:
That reminds me of a weird dream I had where several of us were hit with someone's power and turned into children, and the rest had to look after those individuals. It did not go well, which is expected. LOL
Lilith:
The only one here I can imagine as a child is Charlie, but that's because I kind of FUCKING HAD THAT KID! Anyway, I don't think I want to imagine any of you as kids because... You'd all be awful.
Pop My Cherri:
You're not wrong. When I was a kid, I terrorized all the children in the neighborhood by telling them we all had to peel off our skin or we'd die. Then, I began peeling off a sunburn while screaming as if I was being stabbed. LMAO, and that was just one situation.
STAB:
I had a biting problem as a kid.
Whiskers:
You still have a biting problem.
Harder Daddy:
ARE NONE OF YOU GOING TO HELP ME?
Daddy Issues:
I'm on my way.
Short King:
ME TOO! I am good at searching for things!
Roo:
No you're not. You get distracted too easily.
Short King:
No I don't...
Harder Daddy:
Then where are you going?
Daddy Issues:
... He spotted a food truck. I can't find the kid...
Danger Tits:
Do you need more individuals there? Some on the ground, some in the air?
Harder Daddy:
YES! I DON'T WANT THAT LADY KILLING ME!
Carfight:
As someone who has children... It's kind of her own fault for just handing her kid off to a stranger. Don't get me wrong, I'd be pissed if my child was missing, but seriously... Did she expect anything good from this?
Lilith:
As a fellow mother... I agree.
Daddy Issues:
... I see several children running around. How am I supposed to know which one it is?
Harder Daddy:
The one with massive ass horns. Like, too big for a kid.
Vagina:
... The one fucking running in circles making siren noises?
Harder Daddy:
WHERE?
Big Ass Forehead:
OUTSIDE OF MY FUCKING STUDIO! SHUT THAT BRAT UP!
Screen Queen:
I fucking feel that. I hate kids.
Danger Tits:
So I can stop helping? Good. I couldn't care less anyway. LMAO
Pear:
Why are you being such an ass lately?
Vagina:
... What's new? This is just normal.
Whiskers:
Yeah. She's being nicer than she was. No one's died yet.
Two Dicks:
She went against her girlfriend's wishes and probably made her feel unsafe. This isn't normal.
Screen Queen:
... We're still going on with the girlfriend thing?
Rosie:
Yes, because it's clear that the two of you aren't just "fuck buddies".
Screen Queen:
We aren't fucking anything right now. And we'll never be anything again.
Danger Tits:
I fucking apologized. Damn.
Harder Daddy:
OK, I've got the kid, and Lucifer finally returned.
Short King:
They had interesting foods! I tried a lot of stuff!
Daddy Issues:
Yeah, and do you remember the reason you originally came here?
Short King:
No idea!
Roo:
... As usual, I was fucking right.
Elle:
Now, let's all go find the mother and tell her to take her little shit back.
Morana:
I know who the mother is, and she's in a meeting with me right now. Bring the kid here, and I'll handle it.
Harder Daddy:
... Where the fuck are you?
Morana:
I'll send you the location.
Vagina:
KILL THE LITTLE SHIT!
Daddy Issues:
VAGGIE! NO!
Vagina:
... KILL THE LITTLE SHIT AND THE MOTHER!
Dick Master:
See? You're still one of my exorcist bitches at heart.
Mouth:
Adam, shut up. Damn.
Harder Daddy:
... I threw the kid through the door. Keep it.
Kayden:
Yeah, if some of us were turned into kids, it wouldn't go well. So glad that was just a dream.
Whiskers:
I'm glad too. Any assholes here as kids would be handfuls.
Screen Queen:
... OK, but what the fuck was I doing in that dream?
Kayden:
You were one of the unlucky ones hit by that power or whatever. You ended up running off and getting lost.
Squeak:
That makes too much sense. Wait... Were we all there?
Kayden:
Yes. Everyone in the chat, even Carmine and Bee.
Buzz Buzz:
I'VE BEEN SUMMONED! Where was I? LMAO
Lilith:
Scroll up dumbass.
Buzz Buzz:
Ew, fuck that. Kids suck.
Kayden:
Yeah, you were offering alcohol to all of the kids. It wasn't going well.
Buzz Buzz:
OK, I'm not that irresponsible. Besides... Why would I waste alcohol on children?
Vagina:
I'm willing to bet that in the dream, Carmine was the only level headed individual and found a way to fix the problem, right?
Kayden:
Yeah, that's about right.
Short King:
That dream sounds like a fucking nightmare.
Pop My Cherri:
Does anyone here have normal ass dreams?
Two Dicks:
No. My eggies certainly don't.
Daddy Issues:
I either have very happy dreams, or horrific nightmares. No in between.
Vagina:
I keep having a lot of dreams about my past. It's awful. LMAO
Screen Queen:
Same, but like, my past when I was alive. Fucking terrible.
Harder Daddy:
My dreams are either nightmares, or wet dreams, which is to be expected.
STAB:
I don't sleep!
Rosie:
Yeah, I expected that. Anyway, I'm hosting dinner tonight if anyone would like to join. I know Alastor has already said he'll be there. I'm sure Morana will be joining as well.
Morana:
I've got no plans, so I'll be there.
Mouth:
... Are there going to be non-cannibal options?
Rosie:
Of course there will. I wouldn't invite you if there wouldn't be.
Daddy Issues:
I'll come. Vaggie, you're joining.
Vagina:
... Do I not have a choice or something? LMAO
Daddy Issues:
I meant it as a joke! I'm sorry! I wasn't trying to sound mean!
Vagina:
It's fine... I know. I'll come.
Rosie:
Anyone is welcome... Except Vox.
Big Ass Forehead:
WHY DO YOU ALL TREAT ME LIKE SHIT?
Screen Queen:
Because you deserve it.
Danger Tits:
I'd come, but I have plans.
Lilith:
Oh? With who?
Danger Tits:
You are so fucking nosey... I have plans with Emily.
Squeak:
We're going to this restaurant that just opened. We planned this a while ago when they first started building the place. I told her we should go when it opens, and she shockingly agreed.
Danger Tits:
... I was fucking bored.
Lilith:
A DATE! GASP!
Roo:
Did you just write out "GASP"? You're being so fucking dramatic today.
Short King:
... She was dramatically narrating what I was doing five minutes ago.
Screen Queen:
I'm coming to that dinner thing.
Rosie:
You and I have never chatted, so I'm thrilled.