Hazbin Hotel Group Chat

Heartless bitches have feelings 

A/N: I'm fucking sorry, OK? I never thought I'd be this bad at posting on this story. I have a lot of shit going on, and if anything... These next two chapters are probably ass and weren't worth waiting for. LMFAO

Whiskers:
@ScreenQueen Come get your girlfriend.
Screen Queen:
... I'm not there. I'll be back in like 30 minutes. What's going on?
Whiskers:
She got drunk as shit and is fucking sobbing. I'm not a damn therapist, although you all seem to treat me like that. I don't know how to deal with this.
Vagina:
... Do you know why she's sobbing?
Whiskers:
Fuck no. I'm not going to ask.
Vagina:
... I'm on my fucking way. What the fuck is my life?
Pop My Cherri:
Vel, where the fuck are you at? It's the middle of the night.
Screen Queen:
... With Lilith.
Daddy Issues:
Why are you with my mother?
Lilith:
Reasons. We'll be back soon. Don't worry.
Dick Master:
I'm on my way. I want to witness that stupid bitch sobbing. Sounds funny as fuck.
Squeak:
Stop pounding on everyone's doors as you pass. I was in the middle of a really nice dream asshole.
Vagina:
Do not fucking come down here. This situation is already stressful enough... And weird. Once again... WHAT THE FUCK IS MY LIFE?
Vicks:
Do you guys want to hear about my dream? It was interesting.
Kayden:
We're sharing dreams? I want to go next!
Harder Daddy:
You all don't want to hear mine... Although, it was sexy.
Vagina:
Angel, shut up.
Vicks:
Anyway... I had a dream that all of Hell merged. Like, there were no more rings... Just one big Hell. It was awful though because most of the sins no longer had specific areas to run, so there was nothing but chaos.
Buzz Buzz:
... Yeah, how about fuck no? Lucifer couldn't just rule over one big Hell on his own. I mean, obviously, he is the King of Hell, but he at least has the rest of us to keep our areas in check.
Short King:
... I'm fucking glad.
Kayden:
That's weird... I had the same exact dream.
Pear:
FUCKING SAME! What the fuck?
Roo:
Holy shit... It actually worked? LMFAO, oops.
Mouth:
... I'm starting to not trust your ass again. What the fuck did you do?
Roo:
I found a way to fuck with dreams... LMAO, I tested it on like 4 of you... The fourth just hasn't said shit yet.
Big Ass Forehead:
Why do I keep having dreams about Hell falling apart?
Roo:
... And there he is.
Pop My Cherri:
I had a dream that dildos were necessary for cars to start. There were no keys or gas. You'd just insert a dildo into the car and it would go. If you had a faster car, you needed a vibrating dildo.
Roo:
... That was not my doing. What the fuck is wrong with your head?
Pop My Cherri:
It's all the drugs.
V = D/T:
I had a dream about a library that kept swallowing people. Kind of like some sort of SCP type situation.
Elle:
That's cool as shit.
Screen Queen:
I'm on my way back... Is everything handled or?...
Vagina:
... I have no idea. I'm still concerned and don't understand WHAT THE FUCK MY LIFE IS!
Carfight:
... You need professional help.
Vagina:
Thanks a fucking lot Carmine.
Carfight:
... We both know I'm not wrong.
STAB:
Has anyone seen Alastor? I can't find him.
Rosie:
He's dealing with some business. He never said where though.
Morana:
@FreakyFace Please let Niffty know you're not double dead.
Freaky Face:
I'm dead...
Morana:
Not double dead. Good.
STAB:
Oh... Well, I left one of my roaches in one of his pockets so... If he causes problems, sorry.
Freaky Face:
... The roach already broke something, so thanks for the late warning.
STAB:
You're welcome!
Two Dicks:
How big is the roach?
STAB:
About the size of the human brain.
Dick Master:
WHY THE FUCK WON'T YOU LET ME IN?
Danger Tits:
Because no one fucking wants your ass here. Go the fuck away.
Screen Queen:
... Well, can you let me the fuck in? Damn. I'm sick of him screaming in my ear.
Roo:
I'll gladly let you in... I'd like to have a chat with my wonderful ex-husband.
Dick Master:
FUCK OFF WHORE!
Carfight:
I have a question for anyone who may be more educated on this than me... Why the hell are women called awful things, such as sluts or whores, when they have multiple partners. But when a man does it, he's a player and it's a good thing?
Dick Master:
Because obviously women shouldn't do that shit. It's gross.
Lilith:
... misogyny.
Carfight:
That's what I thought.
Whiskers:
... Update on the sobbing situation. Velvette doesn't know how to handle shit either, because as soon as she saw her girlfriend's fucking face, she started sobbing. Note to self, don't contact her next time.
Daddy Issues:
Aw... She's an empath. There's nothing wrong with that.
Danger Tits:
The problem with that is... I'm still drunk as shit, not explaining why any of this shit happened, and I have to deal with her now.
Screen Queen:
Fuck off.
Vagina:
So, you're not going to explain why you were fucking sobbing?
Danger Tits:
No. Not at all. LMAO
Squeak:
Communication is healthy.
Danger Tits:
... Yeah, that's nice. I'll stick to being unstable.
Squeak:
... Please don't.
Vagina:
... I'm going back to bed then.
Harder Daddy:
OK, I have to share my dream. So, I was in an orgy, and one guy that was there was this old ass man. For some reason, we left and decided to fuck alone... HE HAD THE SAGGIEST DICK I'VE EVER SEEN! Like, it barely worked. I don't know if he could even piss out of it. His cum was literal dust... Fucking disgusting.
Vagina:
SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Daddy Issues:
Wow Angel. That was... Some dream.
Harder Daddy:
IT WAS GROSS!
Roo:
Does anyone want S'mores? I started a fire and I'm making some.
Kayden:
ON MY WAY!
STAB:
FIRE! YAY!
Screen Queen:
... Where did you start the fire?
Roo:
Outside... Where else would I start it?
Pop My Cherri:
UNDER THE STAIRS!
Buzz Buzz:
I'm on my way. S'mores at 3:30 in the morning? FUCK YES!
Holy Drugs:
... I've missed a fucking lot. What the hell?
Squeak:
Yeah... You have.