Hazbin Hotel Group Chat

WOOHOO!

A/N: Sorry... Life has been absolute hell. I'm focusing a lot on my cat lately because the little shit is practically dying. She's been having a lot of issues, so I'm trying to get her better before I ultimately decide to put her down because it would be selfish to keep her alive if she's suffering. I know no one gives two shits, but I feel like an explanation is needed. LMAO

Daddy Issues:
... Who's fighting?
Lilith:
... Carmine is here, and someone started screaming insults at her.
Danger Tits:
Vel, I fucking swear, if it's you... I'm going to drag you by your fucking ear to a cliff and throw you off.
Screen Queen:
... It's not me! 😭
Lilith:
I should've clarified... Some random guy. It's not Vel.
Vagina:
He's going to regret being a dumbass.
Dick Master:
Do you regret it?
Vagina:
... Yes. I was being a dumbass when I was an exorcist. I do regret that. LMAO
Dick Master:
I DIDN'T MEAN THAT BITCH!
Short King:
She knows that asshole.
V = D/T:
... I'm coming over there. My dad is irritating.
Big Ass Forehead:
I DIDN'T DO SHIT!
V = D/T:
You're just existing too loud. Do you have to slam every door?
Big Ass Forehead:
Well, I'm pissed because someone stole my credit card.
Screen Queen:
That was me. I just wanted it. You can have it back next week.
Big Ass Forehead:
YOU HAVE YOUR OWN MONEY BITCH!
Screen Queen:
And? I wanted to use your credit card.
Mouth:
ANGEL! FOR FUCKS SAKE! STOP MAKING THIS SCRABBLE GAME ALL ABOUT SEX!
Harder Daddy:
DICK IS A WORD! IT COUNTS!
Mouth:
You have somehow found a perverted word to use every time it's your turn.
Holy Drugs:
He's always done that... He wasn't allowed to join in family game night... Which we only had once. It didn't end well.
Short King:
I DON'T CARE! I HAVE A JOKE!
Roo:
... Oh fuck this.
Short King:
What do you call a duck that's on drugs?
Pear:
... Of course it's duck related.
Squeak:
I don't know...
Short King:
A QUACKHEAD! 😂😂😂😂
Roo:
Yep... I knew the joke was going to be shit.
Vicks:
I thought it was kind of funny.
Kayden:
... No. The stories of him flirting with Adam are funnier.
Daddy Issues:
MY DAD FLIRTED WITH ADAM? Actually... I should've expected that.
Dick Master:
Don't bring that shit up. Fuck him.
Short King:
Please do!~
Dick Master:
SHUT UP!
Short King:
Oh? And how will you make me?~
Harder Daddy:
HOLY SHIT! LMAO
Dick Master:
EAT A DICK LUCIFER!
Short King:
Only if it's yours!~
Daddy Issues:
I'm officially traumatized.
Lilith:
@Kayden How did you know about that? LMAO
Kayden:
... Roo told me.
Roo:
Yeah, I did. I tell her a lot of shit actually. LMAO
Pear:
ANGEL! NO!
Harder Daddy:
PENIS IS A FUCKING WORD!
Two Dicks:
Whoever that guy is, he's still getting either lectured, or physically harmed by Carmine.
Screen Queen:
So, she's tormenting him. Honestly, just the lectures are torment.
Carfight:
Velvette, would you like to come out here and join this filthy piece of shit?
Screen Queen:
Nope.
Carfight:
Then shut the fuck up.
Danger Tits:
... And people ship them. @PopMyCherri
Pop My Cherri:
COME ON! IT MAKES SENSE! And hey, if you and Vel ever break up, which will probably happen, then she has someone to fall back on as backup.
Screen Queen:
YOU SHIPPED ME WITH CARMINE?
Danger Tits:
She sent me a slideshow on that shit in the middle of the night.
STAB:
Are neither of you just going to comment on how Cherri said you two will most likely break up?
Screen Queen:
No, she has a point. LMAO, we're both very aware of that.
Danger Tits:
Honestly, I have no idea how long we'll even last.
Dick Master:
Don't think you'll have me as a backup. I don't want your traitor ass.
Danger Tits:
... I would rather screw Emily. Hell, I'd rather screw anyone but you, even fucking God.
Squeak:
I don't know if I should be flattered, or concerned.
(God has entered the chat)
God:
I do not want to fuck you.
Danger Tits:
... Good.
Harder Daddy:
HOLD ON! @God, you said Zeus was an asshole last time you were in here.
God:
... He is. Do you know how much cheating and incest went on with him and the other fuckers? Hell, the Olympian gods don't have a family tree... It's a family wreath. I guess he isn't the only one that cheated, so he isn't the only asshole. He's still kind of a dick though.
Holy Drugs:
... So, are you confirming that they existed or?
God:
I just said they're assholes. Take what you will from that.
(God has left the chat)
V = D/T:
... Why?
Buzz Buzz:
You'll get used to it.
Carfight:
... Velvette, stop recording.
Screen Queen:
No. I want to post the guy getting tormented.
Screen Queen:
HELP! SHE'S COMING FOR ME NOW!
Danger Tits:
You're on your own dumbass.
Freaky Face:
... Sometimes I wonder how she became an overlord.
Rosie:
Be nice. I think she's always had potential. She's just... Well...
Harder Daddy:
YOUNG, DUMB, AND FULL OF CUM!
Rosie:
That's definitely not what I was going to say. I agree with the young and sometimes dumb thing though.
Screen Queen:
FUCK OFF!
Elle:
I went to the fucking store, and I return to see some random guy sobbing, Carmine lecturing Vel, and Husk chugging a mystery liquid.
Whiskers:
I just want to feel something honestly.
STAB:
I can stab you! You'll feel that!
Whiskers:
I meant emotionally Niffty.
Daddy Issues:
Husk, you say stuff like that like it's just normal. Are you OK?
Whiskers:
No. 🍾
Morana:
You're making your depression look like a party with that emoji.
Whiskers:
It is.
Buzz Buzz:
... Yeah, no. I don't tolerate that at my parties. Indulge to have fun, not to cope.
Lilith:
This is Hell my dear. Don't think there are any healthy ways to cope, so DRUGS AND ALCOHOL!
Buzz Buzz:
... "My dear"? The fuck?
Lilith:
I DON'T KNOW, OK? It's been a long day!
Squeak:
... It's only noon.
Lilith:
FUCK MY AFTERLIFE!