Life of Libby nelson

Chapter 50

'Right little miss sanderson' I heard someone say again 'no I don't want you I want my mum ' I groaned 'I gave you an extra hour which don't tell your mum about' she said 'I don't care, I don't want you' I said 'what an earth is going on' she asked and I ignored her 'Ruby's down the stairs and seph went with your mum' she said 'i don't care' I frowned 'yeah well you should, we need to go to mine ' she laughed 'im not laughing' I said pulling the covers over my face getting angry that I had to get up 'how about you get up washed and dressed and of your still tired when we get to mine you can nap in my bed' she said 'i don't want to go to y o u r s' I groaned and she pulled the covers off me 'nope, up now and get your Ritalin' she said to me 'your not my mum' I said playing her 'I'm not your right..but she left me to look after you so you should be listening' she told me and I groaned so loud 'you my little one are a big drama queen' she said and i wasn't looking impressed 'I seriously don't care' I gobbed off 'you woke up on the wrong side of the bed, why am I getting your cheek' she asked 'I want my mum' I sighed 'we'll I'm sorry, but she's busy doing things for YOU' she told me 'I don't even want a stupid party' I sighed and she sat next to me 'what is the matter, why have you woke up like this' she asked 'some days I do wake up like this it can't be helped' I said 'anything on your mind..' She asked and I sighed loudly 'fine, Danny's going to the party isn't he' I said 'aren't you happy' she asked 'I'm nervous' I admitted and she hugged me 'it will be okay he's looking forward to seeing you' she smiled and I just shrugged 'I'm sorry' I said 'it's okay just get up' she said tickling me.

'Wheres my mum, I want my mum I miss my mum' I said for the tenth time 'she's on her way' kirsty told me who was playing with my hair as I layed on her 'are you staying again' I asked 'yeah, I'm drinking and your party is in Liverpool and I live here' she laughed 'good I like it when you stay' I smiled 'I like your house too, probably because I'm not lonely' she said 'it's quite homely here' I said 'yeah not when your alone' she said 'I'll move in' I joked 'really..ill sort the room out' she joked aswell 'why don't you move in with us' I asked sitting up as if it was the most genius idea I've ever came up with 'I can't invade yours and your mums personal space' she said 'you won't be, she has one room so do i that leaves 4 rooms left all unused' I said 'but I'm supposed to be having a chat with Danny' she said meaning her dan 'well let's be real..is this what you want..plus you won't have to drive to work for ages you'll be a 10 minute walk' I said winking 'nope, I'm not invading your house' she said 'I'm gunna ask my mum' I said ignoring her 'no your not, I'm a big girl' she said 'I don't care, your lonely I'm going to try and fix it' I said.

'No' mum said 'why not, that's not fair I only want a few drinks at my party' I said leaning on the kitchen island 'because I'm your mum and I said no' she said 'youve been my mum 10 minutes, stop acting the big lord' I said and she looked at me sadly and kirsty shook her head 'your kicking off because I said no to a few drinks, do you know what a few drinks leads to' she asked 'I've drunk so many times before I lived with you I know what it leads to' I said harshly 'clearly not as much as you think..when I was younger a few of us where drinking in an old park and the more we drunk the more we became Unaware and we thought we where clever and did substances we shouldnt of, I was in hospital for weeks, I could of died off a stupid drunken mistake..anyways I'm not going over and over this I'm doing my best to protect you I don't want anything happening to you that did to me , I said no' she said 'I said yes' I smiled sarcastically 'don't start' she told me 'why what you gunna do..cancel the party' I mocked 'if I have too' she told me 'ohh shaking in my boots' I said 'what an earth has gotten into you today' mum asked 'she woke up like this..gobby to me this morning but she  did say sorry' kirsty told her and I rolled my eyes 'you are kidding, I ask one of my friends to look after you and you treat them like that..embarrassing' she said chucking her hands in the air and I lifted my head off the counter and stood straight my natural curly hair now straight waving at the top of my bum lining 'embarrassment..is that what you think I am, well I'm very sorry I can't control myself' I said raising my voice 'yeah..she's a friend you treat her with respect at all times especially when she looks after you' she shouted and I laughed 'you think it's funny, you think this is a joke' she asked 'no..what I think is a joke is you, your a joke what was I ever thinking' I shouted back 'not today..I'm not having it' she said 'not having what..me..good cause ill happily leave' I said getting wound up 'your bullshit, I'm not having it go to your room' she shouted 'my room..away from you..with fucking pleasure' I said launching my plate that I'd been picking my dinner off at the ground infront of her feet 'oh sweet child of mine' nikki seethed through gritted teeth 'just go before you make it worse babe' kirsty said trying to push my the other way and out the door but I was strong on my feet, tears gritted my eyes 'I'm no child of yours' I said kicking the bar stool over and that's when kirsty literally dragged me out 'bedroom..cool down for me' she said and pulled at my hair that's what I do when I'm angry usually, I stomped up the stairs screaming, a few pictures where on the wall that went up the stairs but they wherent there for long. I barged into my room and slammed the door shut and started trashing it, it was like being in London all over again I got to the big canvas of me and nikki and I put hole after hole in it, after a good 20 minutes of trashing my room I began looking around my room and realising it was trashed to my standards I just layed on my bed and cried into the pillow, all I can do is cry, that's how I eventually calm down.  'Can we come in' I heard a thick north accent speak but I didn't answer and the door opened anyways 'oh my giddy aunt' mum said 'geez temper or what' kirsty said and I just cried into the cover I didn't even look at them 'plates, pictures, bar stools..your room' mum said 'the canvas of us' she said and the bed dipped and a hand was on my shoulder 'look at me please' mum said and I turned around 'all over this' she said waving the Ritalin packet infront of me and I just cried more 'just calm down' she said pulling me in for a hug but I didn't hug back this time 'I'd love to know how you wake up like this out of no where it's so horrible to see my child go through so much pain and anger that can't be helped' she said and I cried harder into her shoulder 'it is absolutely awful seeing you like this, this is the second time I've seen you like this since  you started coming to stay with me, it's not a nice sight seeing your child in pain that you can't stop until they've calmed down, I know it started over me saying no but something must of started this off this morning' she said rubbing my back 'it's 4 so I'll go wait for meg down stair' kirsty said leaving us alone 'please speak let me know your okay, I just wish I could help stop this anger that fires from no where, my heart is breaking tight now to see you caught up like this, it must be awful to not be able to control yourself, the pain your in makes me sad please Eliza' she said and I let out a whimper and wrapped one arm around her so tight 'I'm sorry' I said and she kissed my forehead 'this isn't okay..but I'm gunna say it is okay because it is' she said stroking my cheek 'it's not okay you know what they say everything will be okay In the end and if it isn't okay then it isn't the end' I sniffed up 'you know what they say..everything's okay as long as you got people around you that care' she said 'I don't have anyone around me but you' I said letting my other arm go around her 'I'm all you need' she said kissing my forehead 'why do you not even hate me after this' I said wiping my eyes 'because I love you, a mother doesn't hate her child over anger' she said finishing wiping my tears for me 'I just launched a plate and a stool at you' I said 'I think I can live with it, anyways I'm probably yet to see worse situations' she said and I nodded 'it's horrible you know..living with this like I can't help it' I said still cuddled into her chest 'I bet it is, it's horrible to watch knowing I can't help is the worse part' she admitted 'ill clean this up' I said 'leave it for now' she said 'it's party day' we heard a jolly voice saying as he ran up the stairs it was ash we heard to little footsteps following 'happy party day' he said and stopped at my door and looked around my room he as holding a bouquet of flowers and a gift bag and his kids had old of a present each as well 'not a good time' he asked 'not right now' mum said 'no now is a good time I'm okay..aren't I' I nodded at mum and stud up and then pulled mum up 'what happened here' his eldest boy asked 'nothing I was looking for something that's all' I smiled and took both boys hands and we walked down the stairs leaving mum and ash up them 'all better' kirsty asked sitting next to the table which still had my presents on 'yeah all better' I nodded giving her a hug 'I'm sorry' I said 'that's fine I'm all about forgive and forget' she smirked and  pulled back and turned away and she smacked my bum 'oi' I laughed and walked off with the boys In to the kitchen. 'Can we have juice' buddy asked 'alright, what juice' I asked 'coke' he said bouncing 'I'm not soo sure you are aloud that' I laughed 'we are..I am..but mason can have black currant' he told me 'are you joking' I asked and he shook his head cheekily 'how about a j2O each' I asked and they both nodded and I lifted mason onto the island bar stools as he was to small to get up up on his own 'here you go..anything else' I asked 'snacks' buddy asked 'like what' I asked 'nana' mason said and I looked at buddy 'he wants a banana, he calls them nanas' buddy laughed 'how about I do us all a snack' I said and they both nodded and I got 3 plates out the cupboard and set them on the side and put a banana on masons a banana on buddy's and a apple on mine then made a little sand which for us all and put it on the plate along with a chocolate bar and some crisps 'here..is this okay' I asked 'wow' mason said and I giggled and sat across from them 'so are you excited for the party' I asked 'I am' buddy smiled 'plane' mason said 'no we aren't going on a plane today' buddy said to his younger brother 'in 8 days' I smiled 'me sit next to you' he asked 'if you want' I smiled 'are you our sister' buddy asked 'hmm it's complicated bud' I said 'our mummy said you where like a big sister to us' he said 'well yeah you can say that I am' I nodded 'and my mummy said that your mummy was like our second mummy and that only special boys get two mummy's' he said 'yeah only special people get more than one bud' I smiled it made me happy that ashs ex wasn't blowing this new girlfriend thing badly 'so me and mason are special cause we have two mummy's' he asked and I nodded 'what did your mummy say' I asked 'she told us weeks ago that when we go to daddy's he has a new girlfriend and we have to be good and then 2 days ago when we came to daddy's work with him she said we have to be good and be nice to Nikki as she's special and when I asked why she told me that nikki is like her just not the real one' he said eating his sand which 'your always a good boy' I smiled 'and she said that nikki will be there for us to go to when we feel like we need a mummy cuddle but she isn't around' he said 'that's right whenever you need a mummy cuddle when your here you can go to my mummy' I nodded 'my mummy likes nikki' he told me and smiled 'erm' I said looking at the door way after I saw a flash 'sorry cute kid moment..picture was needed' Ashley said and I rolled my eyes playfully 'what use talking about' he asked as he sat next to me 'well they boys where hungry so I just made them some snacks and we talked about my party..Egypt and the plane and then their mum..she's told them to be good for nikki as she's their mummy too basically' I said 'that's right isn't it boys' ash said and they both nodded 'mummy said nikkis our second mummy and we go to her when mum isn't around' buddy said 'yeah except instead of calling her mummy you call her nikki' ash smiled 'yeah she's still a second mummy just with a different name' buddy smiled 'right come on megs waiting for you' mum said 'oh and by the way miss destroy the room..we tidied yours' ash said and I got up and hugged and thanked them both before going into the living room to get my make up done.