Life of Libby nelson

Untitled Part 67

I woke up and stretched as best I could, I was so uncomfortable now, I was only 29 weeks for the past 9 weeks I've had my ups and down, I don't know if I'll ever come to terms of having one alive baby and one passed baby inside of me, I've had scans to keep checking baby A and at my 4D one baby B was there so tiny compared to her sister the doctor did warn me to be prepared of a glimpse whenever I had scans, I needed scans because of my condition but also because I myself needed reassurance. Nick was supposed to be back 2 weeks ago but he has to stay a few more weeks, to say we are missing him is an understatement we haven't seen him for 9 weeks and when he is back it will be hitting 12 weeks so I will be 32 weeks, I'm so used to it being just me and Anna it's going to be weird with him back. Lawson obviously went back to work a few days after we lost baby B and never really contacted till he came home when I was 24 weeks for the weekend, but he's been gone again 5 weeks and has only messaged about 2 to 3 times a day about our baby, he just seems to be becoming so much more distant from me and it hurts because I genuinely do love him so much and I know the loss of the baby is putting strain on us but we should be there for each other, he's just so sheepish and private. It's hard to also believe it's November 17th and that I found out all those months back, my due date is a week after felicities 3rd birthday so 16th January originally but I won't make it to that, my induced date will be the 37 week mark which is 29th December which isn't that far away at all.

'Hey baby' Anna said as I came down dressed for work 'hey annie' I said 'you feeling good' she asked 'fine, uncomfortable but that's expected' I smiled as I slipped my coat on and grabbed the slice of toast off the side I asked Anna to make 'good, as long as you're good' she smiled 'we going then' she laughed as I walked ahead of her and I giggled 'I'll take that as a yes then' she shouted down as I leant against the car door. We drove to work mostly in silence because I don't really talk in the car unless I'm singing my little heart out, there was fans outside the gates already it was only 8:45am but some travel from all over, I gave a quick wave as we went past them and Anna parked up into our usual spot 'what time do you finish' she asked '3 and I don't even start till half 10, you' I asked 'me too but then I'm back in at 8 for a night shoot' she said and I looked at her blankly 'I did tell you this last week, you can either stay at Nikkis or come home and Kirsty will come over' she said 'I'll decide later' I nodded 'I start shooting in half hour so I gotta dash to get ready' she said bending down with her lips poured out and planting them on my cheeks 'I love you, see you soon' she said 'I'll be in soon, going to see the fans before we enter..I love you too' I told her as she walked off and I walked back towards the gate to see some fans, a few regular but a few new 'hi guys' I smiled 'hiya guys' I smiled 'hi beth' one girl said and I recognised her but didn't know her name well I did it's between Lucy and Luisa I just couldn't remember which one 'selfie' Jade asked I knew her she was here a lot 'of course' I laughed and then Chloe who was always about popped out of no where 'Lola-jo is on her way she's nearly here she said don't leave' Chloe said 'here' I said taking her phone from her to speak to LJ who was like my biggest fan for real she was 16 just turned  'hiya' I said 'that you beth' she asked 'sure is, where you at I've been waiting' I joked 'literally here, look left' she laughed and she and few other were legging it up the street and I laughed at them all 'calm down I've just got here' I said as they've approached me and the others 'Chloe phoned and was like run Beth's going again' she said and Chloe smirked 'just thought I'd pop out before I go in' I said 'good, cause I can only stay till 3' Lola said 'I finish at 3' I laughed 'good job you're here now then' she said getting her phone out for what I'm presuming was selfies 'your bump is so neat, are you excited' one of the girls asked 'yeah I am, for labour..no but for a life with my daughter yes' I smiled 'you'll be brilliant, you going to bring her here' Lucy asked 'yes' I nodded 'can we get pictures with her' Chloe asked 'yeah why not' I smiled 'you ok there LJ' I asked Lola who looked pretty blank 'yeah I just found what I wanted to show you' she smiled 'let's see' I asked as she turned her phone my state of mind was shocked but I tried to not to let my face show it for the girls sake  'wow, come here' I said pulling her in and Theo and Malique came out and the girls went over to them and I took Lola to one side 'are you ok' I asked 'yeah I'm ok, sad but ok' she said 'don't worry..have you told anyone' I asked 'just Chloe, she came with me and she's knew for a while like me' she said 'how many weeks' I asked 'I thought 12  it when she did it the baby measured at 16' she said 'look I'm in your position too but telling people will make it easier' I nodded 'I'm scared' she said 'so am I, i was when I first found out to but now I have it out there it's easier' I smiled rubbing her arm 'what if my mum disowns me' she asked 'she's your mum, she loves you' I said to her 'I'll do it tonight, can you keep an eye on your twitter to DM me' she asked 'of course my love, anything for you' I said as we walked back to everyone 'check you out Beth gal, out here early' malique said 'doing my rounds me' I laughed 'us too, we don't film for another hour' he said 'me too' I laughed and Theo give me a cheeky smile which I did take in to account but then brushed it off 'anyways a girls gotta go get ready' I said 'but you literally take 5 minutes, not as if you have to use a fake bump' Chloe wined 'if you're here at 3 I'll be back' I said and she nodded 'bye, if I don't see you after remember what I said' I told Lola-jo giving her a hug and she nodded and I waved bye 'see you in there boys' I said to the lads 'yes you will lass' mal said and I just laughed he was such a fool 'Theo will see you soon to won't you lad' he said smacking his co worked over the head and the fans laughed, I shook my head and carried on.