Life of Libby nelson

Chapter 32

'Muuuuuuuum' I cried/shouted 'what now' Jesy shouted up the stairs 'I've been sick again' I cried 'ill bring you some water' she said and I kept my head rested on the toilet seat,I was sick,Jesy give me her sickness bug except I've had it yesterday and today where as Jesy was only sick the one day,she wasn't physically sick yesterday she just had a headache but I was she was supposed to be in the studio yesterday but she couldn't because she was still a bit poorly and then I got sick and flossy is home today as jesy's better,she's had to take an extra 2 days off recording to look after me and well flossy she takes her with her whilst I go to school but I'm off,Monday and Tuesday so far I hope I'm off tomorrow to,I never enjoy school no more,not since siri passed. Carter is coming tonight he came yesterday and he said he wanted to see me tonight he brought me flowers and a new hot water bottle yesterday it's so cute and fluffy. 'Here' jess said passing me the bottle,I sipped abit and then put my head down the toilet just as quick 'muuum' I cried for the tenth time in 5 minutes 'I'm here,shhhh' Jesy said rubbing my back with one hand and holding my long pony tail with the other 'you are soooooo dramatic' Jesy laughed as I drooped my head and made weird noises 'jess' I moaned 'just saying' she laughed and I got up and swirled my mouth 'I don't even think I can stomach carter coming over later' I sighed as I flopped onto my bed 'want me to cancel on him' she asked sitting infront of me and rubbing my belly and I nodded.

I woke up on the toilet floor of my en suite,ugh,I had a stiff back but managed to get up,my head was sore and I still felt sick but I still managed to go down the stairs to see Jesy sat on the couch,'how's my sick baby' she asked looking behind at me 'I'm ok,stiff but ok' I smiled weakly 'you look white I think you need the doctor' she said pulling a confused face 'no I'm okay' I said getting a bottle of water and going to the couch and sitting next to her 'look at this of floss what Jordan sent me' she smiled at her phone so big and I felt a pang of jealousy which I mentally felt like hitting myself in the face 'aw' I said 'your poorly you can tell' she laughed 'yeah but I just got a pang of jealousy,we have had 3 nights alone and it reminded me of old times,just me and you' I sighed looking away 'why are you jealous' she asked 'I don't know,I like it just me and you,I like old times before the bullying,depression,suicide attemps,arguments and deaths now everything's changed you have your family,flossy and well Jordan a little bit and I know I have you but I just feel out of place..ya know I just sometimes feel like no one cares even you do and I feel like I don't fit in this family now,like everything's my fault' I shrugged and she pulled me to look at her 'here look at this' she said pointing at her lock screen which was me and flossy in the airport the day I came back,it's not a proper photo though,it's of the side view,when I first met my family after those 60 days and I asked if I could hold flossy it's of me smiling down at her,it's cute I guess 'this' she said and then unlocked her phone and showed me her home screen which was me and flossy again dressed in our matching bikinis and little bow headbands on holiday 'and this..these are the only things I care about,you and felicitie are all I am bothered about,you are my family and if you don't feel like I don't care then you don't know me very well' she laughed and I sighed and layed my head on her legs feeling the sickyness coming back 'because Honestly el I love you so much and I care more than you will ever know and yeah things have changed but not everything,you are still my everything you never forget that' she said stroking my hair 'love you jess..I really do' I smiled 'and I love you too and do you think if I didn't care I'd of wanted you all to myself all these years' she laughed and I shook my head 'no if I didn't care I would of just been like a normal sister to you I wouldn't of done everything for you from a young age I wouldn't of thought you where mine when I was silly ages young honestly you where born when I was 7 and when we went to town I'd push your pram and make mum let me do your nappys and feeds I was only a kid myself,oh and your night feeds I used to wake up with mum and help out she would go mad because I had school but I kicked off until she let me stay up and then as you got older I did more for you as I was older like I was 11 when you where coming up 4 your first day of school I begged for mum to let me take you and she didn't want to agree but in the end she did and she stood by the reception door and watched me take you to your class the teacher saw her and waved and laughed she knew how I was with you then I got to 18 and you where nearly 11 I wanted you to move in my very first flat and mum was having none of it at all and then we got older like we are now and I forever wished you where my own,josh knew I always thought of you as my own and he was ok he didn't think it was weird but Johnny he said I can't be close to you well as much as I am or you'd think I was your mum which if you do the math your not stupid enough to think I am but honestly if I don't care I would of let you stay with mum life a hellish life but I love you so much and I promise your just as important as felicitie' she said kissing my nose. 'For the first time in years I feel wanted' I smiled 'you have always been wanted' she whispered oh no I sprinted off and into the downstairs toilet,oh how I hate having a sickness big,I whipped my mouth and rinsed it out and turned round to see Jesy in the door way 'this.is.your.fault.' I dragged out and she giggled 'back to bed please' she said pointing to the stairs and I nodded.

I've been lying in bed since Jesy instructed and it's not very productive I'm sick of my four walls and netflix,although a little nap and 3 hours later I'm feeling better asif I could eat,I hear screaming down stairs which indicates flossy is back,I get up and go down stairs and I see not only jess and flossy sat there but dad,Rachel and Leighton 'hi guys' I smiled 'Eliza how are you feeling' jess asked 'I'm okay thankyou..hi dad,Rachel' I smiled 'how are you feeling jess told us your not well' dad asked 'I'm not I've been sick for 2 days' i sighed 'not good' he shook his head 'how are you Rachel' I asked leaning against the sofa stood up 'I'm good your little sister doesn't stop bouncing,4 months can't come quick enough' she laughed and I just nodded 'any names' jess asked and I rolled my eyes why is she being pally pally she hated the idea of a sister a few months back and looked at her with a what the hell look and she shrugged 'erm yes we have her name' Rachel smiled and I smiled back and looked at Leighton who was playing with flossy in her bouncer 'go on then' dad urged her to tell us 'fine okay we have chosen after many ideas we have come to the decision on Lilah-jess as her first name and Elizabeth as a middle and nelson as her last' she smiled so proudly,wow great cheesy naming her after us I thought 'love it' I smiled and walked off to the fridge. Scanning the shelves I couldn't find what I was after so I got out a single strawberry from the packet and headed for the cupboard,scanning that I couldn't find what I was looking for it's that full,I could hear everything they where saying as if they're trying to be quiet 'how's she settling in' 'how's school going' 'does she miss her mum yet' ugh stop dad, 'muuuuuum' I shouted as I walked back through the arch way that sperated the kitchen and living room 'yes babe' she asked and I lent over the couch,dad and Rachel where looking shocked and in a way terrified 'do we have any doughnuts' I cheekily smiled at her 'missy your sick no sugar things till your better' she said looking at me and I pouted sadly 'you can have some toast or fruit' she suggested 'but muuuuuuum' I dragged out 'but nothing' she said standing up 'I feel better' I argued 'feeling better or not your having toast or fruit for now and that's all,want me to make it or yourself' she asked and I sighed 'you please' and she nodded 'be back in a minute I'm going to make her some toast' she said going out of our way and I smirked dad and Rachel's faces where pictures when I called jess mum 'Elizabeth' dad asked and I looked at him 'you do know jesy's your sister' he said 'yeah i wasn't born yesterday' I rolled my eyes 'so where did mum come from' he asked shaking his head 'from my mouth dad,she's been a better mum to me than Janis she's always doing stuff for me and to be honest dad without her I don't know where I'd be and she took me in when mum kicked me out' I sighed 'that doesn't mean she's your mum' he swallowed the lump in his throat I could tell 'yeah it does in my books anyways,she adopted me you do know that right' I asked raising an eye brow 'what..why' he asked 'because mum kicked me out for going to see jess when josh died and she still blames me for his death a few weeks on' I said sadly putting my head down 'oh' was all he said 'and jess she took me in,kept me on the narrows and helped with schooling,do you see why' I asked and he just nodded 'why nod why not say out' I asked 'I don't know what to say' he shrugged 'yeah because your feeling bad that you never knew any of this or that you wherent there to help because you don't stay on contact enough' I started getting angry now 'not at all,I'm just processing the fact my daughter calls my other daughter mum,it's weird and I wish I knew I'd of been there' he said 'it's not weird in my books,if you don't like it then I'm sorry but you know where the door is' I said standing up just as Jesy brought my toast in 'what's happening' she asked 'him he doesn't like the fact you have adopted me or bring me up now he thinks it's all weird so I said if he was there or kept intouch everyday he'd know' I said taking my plate off her 'no need to get angry though' dad said and I laughed 'Eliza' Jesy sighed at me 'but mum' I said 'but nothing' she glared back 'you know what I'm going back up stairs I feel sick still' I said taking one slice of toast and giving the other to my mum 'wait Elizabeth' mum said but I slowly walked off listening in really on them 'dad what the hell' I heard jess say 'what jess that's not normal,she's calling you mum she's 15 and your 23 it doesn't make sense' he said 'well it does to her,will you leave her alone she's happy and she feels wanted for once and if she is happy calling me mum then I'm happy because she's my world she's just as important to me than flossy' I heard jess say and I smiled 'right ok I'm not sure what to think..but if she's ok and her minds gone back to normal I guess I'll put up with it' dad said and I jogged off up the rest of the stairs,it's like 6pm and I can't go anywhere even if I was feeling a bit better because jess said I have to stay in till I've stopped being sick which sucks because now I'm in bed for the rest of the night.