It was amazing.
It was beautiful.
It was wild.
The verse that the kids recorded for the chorus was incredible. I don't think I could have made it any better than the way it had been done. I loved it. I loved it so much. I almost loved it as much as I loved Connor.
Standing outside of the building right by the entrance, I called Connor at around eleven forty five PM when I was done in the studio. I heard and felt the wind creep up my spine as I looked out into the parking lot, listening to the ringing of my phone as it called Connor. I felt kind of bad that it was really late, but I didn't have much money with me, so I couldn't pay for a taxi. Connor answered almost immediately.
"Troye!"
"Hey Con."
"What's up? Is everything alright?"
"Yeah, yeah, I just finished at the studio."
"Oh, how was it?"
"Great. Actually, greater than great."
"That's good to hear." I felt Connor's smile through the phone. I got a warm feeling inside at the thought of him. "Yeah, well, being the irresponsible person I am, I forgot to bring enough money with me, so I need a ride back to your place......"
"Hey man, no problem, I'll be right there."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, of course I am."
"Connor if you're tired I can call someone else, I hope it isn't inconvenient for you."
"Troye, it's almost midnight, who else would be able to bring you home?"
"I mean, I could call Tyler." At that point I could tell that I slightly angered Connor a little. He was still mad at Tyler, and I'm sure he didn't want anything to do with him.
"I'll be right there." Connor said bluntly, after a brief pause.
It went silent over the phone call. The same silence I felt in the taxi rides in the UK. The same silence you would feel when you got in trouble by an adult. The silence you feel when you know you've made a mistake.
"Sorry." I uttered, breaking the silence. "Why?"
"I know you're still mad at Tyler."
"Yeah, I guess."
"Sorry."
"It's not your fault, it's just that, you know, Tyler has feelings for you and everything."
"Yeah....."
"Troye," I heard the car engine turning on in the background of the call. "I would just hate to lose you. I would hate it so much."
"I would hate that too, Connor."
"I really don't want to lose you."
"Connor, trust me, I don't want to lose you either. I'm so lucky, you have no idea. You are the nicest, cutest, friendliest, most creative, sensible, wild guy ever."
"I love you so much, Troye."
"And I love you so much more, Connor. So please don't even think about losing me, because my biggest fear right now is losing you." I heard Connor sniffle and came to the conclusion that he was probably crying.
"Please don't cry." I said, my voice cracking. "I'm just so happy to have you." Connor said to me, his voice breaking up into parts. My phone then vibrated in my hands, scaring me. It read, "10% Remaining". I frowned a little, with the realization that I would have to hang up.
"Connor," I started, "My phone's about to die, so I'll see you real soon, okay?"
"Okay."
"Okay."
"Are we Hazel and Augustus?"
"Yeah, but I'm Hazel."
"Why?" Connor laughed a little.
"Because I'm not dying."
"I hate you TroyeSivan18."
"Bye Connor!" I said laughing.
"Haha see you soon Troye boy."
The line cut off, and the aura of loneliness crept back to me.
About five minutes later, Connor's car pulled into the parking lot. I started walking to the car until I saw Connor get out of the front seat and walk to me. As he got closer, he spread his arms out, motioning for a hug. I ran.
I didn't walk.
I didn't speed walk.
I ran.
And I ran straight into his arms.
I hugged him tight, hearing him say "I love you." I felt a tear roll down my face as I responded, "I love you too."
Thoughts raced in my mind while he was holding me in his arms, and they sounded a little like this:
I love that he knows me. I love that he gets me. I love his facial expressions. I love his hugs. I love his friendly flirting. I love his smile. I love his frown. I love his sense of humor. I love his laugh. I love the way he thinks. I love the way he talks. I love the way his eyes light up at the sight of me. I love that he cares. I love that he's always a phone call away. I love that he won't give up on me. I love that he won't let distance get in the way of our relationship. I love that he's protective. I love that he's my best friend. I love that he's the reason that I'm always happy. I love that he doesn't want to lose me.
I love that he loves me,
because I love him.
