Lovesick

-Twenty-

I flinched as I felt his other hand hold my wrist that had cuts on them. "What?" he asked, worried.

"It's n-nothing." I said then took my hand back.

"Jas...." Shawn said, I could hear the concern in his voice.

"What's going on???" Matt asked.

"I-I need some.... alone time with Jas please." Shawn said. Matt nodded then got up, leaving the room, closing the door "i-it's not what you think." i said.

"Then let me see." He said. I sat up and didn't let Shawn see my wrists. Shawn got ahold of my hand then put my sleeve up and took away the paper towel. "Jasmine...." he said tearing up. "Three years...." he said. "Three years... you were three years clean." Shawn said. "Why?"

My bottom part of my jaw shook, as I cried. He brought me into his arms and I cried into his shoulder. "I'm sorry for breaking the promise." i said, "I'm so so sorry."

"Sh sh sh... it's okay." he said, "But please tell me.... why?" he asked as he let go of me. I shook my head, "I-I don't want to talk about it right now." I said. Shawn nodded. "Can you cuddle with me please?" I asked. He nodded. I laid down and Shawn wrapped his arms around me, pulling me closer to him. I laid my head on his chest and sighed. It felt like the good old times. I felt Shawn's hand in my hair, playing with it. "You are an amazing, beautiful, smart girl Jasmine." he said. "don't forget that." he said. I nodded. "I have no idea what's going on but I hope you can tell me soon." he said then paused. After a few minutes, he continued to talk. "Everyone goes through though times." He said. "You just gotta learn to fight through them." he spoke. "You can't have  rainbow with out the sunshine. You can't have the pot of gold without crossing the rainbow." he said, causing me to smile a slight bit. I turned my head to look up at him. "what is up with you and rainbows?" I asked, giggling. He shrugged. I laughed then put my head back onto his chest. 

~~~~~

I opened my eyes from my nap and saw Shawn laying down in front of me, staring at me. "Stopppp." I whined then put my pillow on top of my head. He would always do this when we were dating, and it always made me feel self-conscious. Shawn uncovered my face by taking the pillow away then said, "Oh stop it Jas." he said, chuckling. I smiled then sat up. Shawn sat up as well then said, "Do you feel better???" he asked.

"Yea." I said, "Somewhat I guess." i said. I rolled up my sleeves to see all my cuts stopped from bleeding. I sighed. Shawn held my wrists then brought it to him, up to his face and kissed all the scars. Then slid the sleve back down. "Is Matt still here?" I asked.

"No, I sent him home." He said. I looked down at my wrists that were hidden with my sleeves. "Don't looked at that." he said then cupped my chin with his hand and tilted my head to face him. I stared into his eyes, thinking about the memory I had about Shawn when I was in a coma.... where he said he loved me. Shawn cleared his throat then looked away. I looked down then laid back down, sighing. Shawn laid down as well and stared at the ceiling as I start at him. 

Should I tell him I know what he said..... Or should I keep it to myself??