Dark Night Dark Light

Chapter 47

My eyes flutter open. My stomach still feels like it has something in it that it wants to vomit out. This is a feeling that I am starting to grow use to. Now I know that this whole time that I was getting sick had something to do with this little one. My mouth is dry as a desert I feel dehydrated, even though I know that I am hooked up to a fluid bag and there is no possible way that I would be dehydrated. 

I look to my side and see that Missy is sitting in the chair next to my bed. Her head is drooping as she sleeps sitting up. She has been something wonderful this whole time. I know that she must be a wreck by now. There at one point of time Aaron held the gun to Bam. I know that for that short time Missy thought that she was going to loose her husband. That is something I know that nobody wants to face. Even though she has been through a lot she hides the stress well. 

Everything seems like a dream in a way, or like it is going so fast that I can't wrap my head around it. The only person that I want to be in this room, has yet to make it. It's not that I don't like Missy. To be honest I think that I love her like a sister at this moment in time. She has proven that she is far more than a friend. I don't know what I would do if she wasn't here to take my mind away from all of the bad things that have been happening in the last 24 hours. I just thought that I would be able to see Ville as soon as I got away from Aaron. 

As far as I know Bam is still at the other hospital, trying to make sure that Ville is able to come and see me. It would be nice to see him and to tell him that we have a baby on the way. I don't know how Ville will take the news. I am pretty sure that he will be happy, but then the thought comes to my mind again, what if he's not happy about it. What if he doesn't want the baby? What if I am forced to make the choice of him or the baby? I wish that Bam and Ville would hurry up so I don't have to live with these thoughts anymore. They are like lingering demons that just keep showing their ugly face.

Thoughts of Aaron fill my head. I thought that I would forget all of these memories as soon as I was rid of him. These thoughts are the biggest demon like thoughts that I have. But at this moment in time the memories flood into my mind. I can remember when we first met. We met at school. I use to think that he was so cute, but at the time I was dating some other guy. The other guy that I was dating made it very easy for me to move on to Aaron after he told me that he loves me, but he is not in love with me. I took that as my easy way out of that relationship since we both just liked each other as friends.

I can remember how Aaron made me feel on top of the world at first. He made me feel like he loved me with all of his heart. He would always include me when he went out with his friends. It was like he was not afraid to show me off to the world and he had a ton of friends who really liked him. It seemed like he was always looking out for me and my happiness. 

I guess that I never really noticed anything till it was too late. Everything seemed to transition slowly. Over time he would start to break friendships that he had before he met me. He would always tell me that it was because those friends were either talking bad about me or they wanted to have sex with me. To be honest, at that time I understood. I know that I would be angry with one of my friends if they started talking bad about him or wanted to have sex with him. 

Over the course of the next month he started to show signs of jealousy. I always thought that it was because he was just insecure. I thought that it was caused by the horrible upbringing that he would talk about. He would talk to me about his mother and how she was a horrible mother and would allow his step-father to abuse him. He hated his mother for that and at the time I understood. I also felt that it was because of that is why he would get jealous with me, because he just felt like I was something good that happened in his life and he wanted to just hold on to it. But then later in time I found out that his mother didn't raise him the way he use to talk about. She did the best that she could and that is all that you can ask out of anyone. She always loved him and would try to help him in any way that she could.