My Fear (Eric Divergent Fanfic)

Chapter 2

I wake up with a blistering headache, naked in bed with--Eric?

The events of last night flood my mind with the memories. Oh god, is all I can think. I desperately want to escape from his bed, but I'm embarrassed I'm going to wake him up and he's going to yell at me, punish me--I don't know.

I look over at the clock, 7:30. Shit, I'm late for training. I have no time to feel embarrassed Four is going to have my ass. I rush to grab my things, Eric is still sound asleep, thank god.

I put on my clothes and have no time to change or shower or do anything, I run to the training room.

They're all throwing knifes at targets.

"I'm sorry I'm-" Four puts his hand up to interrupt me.

"No excuse. Do you want to be Dauntless or not?" His expression is anger, his voice coarse and the least bit tender.

Eric walks in the room, how'd he get here so fast? Maybe I did wake him up, but he didn't say anything and pretended to be asleep. Either way my face turns red at the sight of him.

"What's going on?" He smiles putting his hand on fours shoulder.

"Candor is late." Four scowls me.

"Well, we can't have that can we?" Eric clicks his tongue.

What? You would think he'd go easy on me, I guess not. I guess last night meant nothing to him. I mean nothing to him. A mistake.

"Stand in front of the target." Eric says.

Everyone stops throwing.

"What-" I say in quiet tone of voice.

"Now!" His voice booms. I flinch at his harsh tone of voice. Don't let them see you cry, I repeat to myself.

I stand in front of the target, my hands shaking nervously.

"You can do it then." I hear Four mumble handing Eric four knives.

Eric snatches them out of Fours hand and stands directly in front of me just ten feet away.

"No flinching." He smirks then his eyes turn dark. "Or you're out."

The knife whips pass my head landing next to my eye into the wood behind me.

The next two he throws are fast and hit on the other side of me and the next above my head.

He has one left in his hand, I want to close my eyes so bad, but I have to keep them open.

I feel a sharp sting in my arm, the rest of the initiates gasp. I look at my left arm and the knife stuck inside it.

"Let this be a lesson. No one is late." Eric turns away with no sympathy in his eyes for what he's done.

"Go to the infirmary." Four says walking over to me. "Someone bring her." He pinches the bridge of his nose.

"I'm fine." I say with anger in my eyes. I grab the knife by the handle and yank it out of my skin. Blood spills from my arm and I rush to catch up to Eric.

I hit him on the back and he ferociously turns around, fire in his eyes.

"Did you just touch me?" He shouts angrily.

I point the bloody knife at him. "What the HELL was that about?" I say feeling a tad woozy from the blood pouring out of my wound.

"Don't be late next time." He says attempting to turn and walk away from me.

I grab his wrist and try my best to pull his attention back toward me, he doesn't budge but turns around anyways.

"You know exactly why I was late. And you are punish me?!" I begin to shout. He puts his hand over my mouth and pushes me against the wall of the corridor.

"Last night was nothing. Get over yourself." He removes his hand and takes a step back.

"You-" I want to scream, but my vision starts to blur and I pass out Eric catching me last minute.

I wake up in the infirmary, a bloody bandage around my arm. Eric is sitting at my bedside.

"How long have I been here?" I say groggily.

"About an hour, you got stitches. You'll be fine." He says unfeeling. "It'll probably scar."

I feel like I want to scold him. At the same time, I want to kiss him. No, I'm angry. I attempt to cross my arms, but I still can't move my left.

"Get some rest." He commands.

I don't say anything, I look away from him. I can feel his eyes on me.

"You can leave now." My eyebrows push together, my irritation level is high.

"Don't blame me for your mistake initiate, you should've kept track of time."

"How can you be so-" I clench my fists together, "annoying!" Is that really the best I can come with? "You have no regard for anyone but yourself. You don't care about me and I know it. So thanks for that one manipulative night. I never want to see you again."

Eric bites down on his cheek and smiles in the process, he leans in close to me. His lips nearly touching my ear. "Watch yourself." He leans back and stands straight up, his lips pursed. He walks away. I resume breathing, I hadn't realize I started to hold my breath when he started inching toward me.

The next few days of training were rough, I felt sick, I felt nervous with Eric watching me. I wish he hadn't watched every fight. Sometimes I can't tell if he's there to watch me or to look after Four. God knows how much he loves Four--sarcasm.

Two weeks later I make it passed the first phase of initiation, I am number three in the ranking among transfers, Peter and Will above me. I won the fights against Tris, Christina, Molly and Drew, oh and the Amity girl. It was just the larger boys that I constantly was getting my ass beat.

The next stage of training was time to face our fears, something I'm definitely not ready for. Theres a number of things I'm terrified of, who knows what fear is going to simulate today.

I sit down in the chair and Four injects a large needle into my neck, good thing my fear isn't needles. I close my eyes and I wake up in Eric's apartment. Oh no. I look around, I don't see anything. I turn around and there is Eric, my heart rate instantly increases. He inches in closer, "You mean nothing." He smirks, "You'll never mean anything. You're so easy to manipulate you know that right?" He grabs my arms tight.

"I don't want to do this again." I cry out. "Please."

He throws me down on the bed and hovers over me. I'm not fearful of intimacy or sex, am I scared of Eric?

His muscles are crushing my body, suffocating me. I feel like I'm dying as he roughly gropes me.

"This is all I want and then you can leave- until next time."

I can't free any part of my body, his legs holding mine down and his hands holding my wrist above me head. I bash him in his head with mine, immediately I get a headache but I have to escape him.

I punch him in the face and yell, "no, I matter and you can't use me." I punch him once more and suddenly I'm throw myself up in the metal chair back in the dauntless room with Four. I start to shake, my breathing unable to calm down from the simulation. I don't even want to look back Four, I know he say everything.

"Elena..." Four says uncomfortable, "did Eric-"

"No." I shake my head and plaster my hand against my face. "Just leave it alone...can I go now?" I sigh.

Four nods his head sympathetically and escorts me out of the room. I head back to the dormitory where everyone is talking about their fears. I don't want to talk about mine, who else can say Eric is their fear. How is Eric my fear, how did this become such a part of my life where every time I see him I cower in fear. He ruined me.