Why She Stayed (xxxtentacion)

X.06

I was trying my best to avoid any skin-ship. Which proved quite difficult to do the faster he sped down the block. I was insane for doing what I was with X. But at the same time a part of me sought a thrill and this was as close to one as I was bound to get.

He was laughing like a mad man the faster down the road we got. "Hold on." He shouts over my shoulder.

Knowing we we're bound to go faster I leaned my head into his back, wrapping my arms around the back of his waist. Feeling his rock hard abs against the smoothness of my skin, it felt like an out of body experience.

I was unknowingly caressing his skin and I swear the bike suddenly slowed down and I felt him flinch.

My throat gets tight as I feel my heart thudding in my chest.

My thighs squeezed tighter against him the faster we went. Holding onto him as tight as this was exactly how the both of us would be in the distant future. Holding him like it was my first and last time became a habit of ours.

Neither one of us knowing exactly what tomorrow could bring, if tomorrow came. I just knew that I didn't want what was happening now to end.

His fingers, brush against the the top of my hand as he lifts it into his own. Fighting my own reaction, I stiffen again. His grip is gentle, though. His fingers warm on my skin, and his thumb...I can feel it caressing against me soothingly. Closing my eyes, I try to regain myself but instead find myself blushing.

"Don't let go." X says.

Never, I heard myself say.

I lift my head from his back where it was resting and stare out into the sky, the sky which grow darker with each passing second. As I held onto him I couldn't help but smile. I never thought I'd end up here in this position. If only X knew how much he meant to me, how much of me he'd saved.

We were rounding the corner to our block again and this time he slowed down and came to a sudden stop. I didn't let go of him even when he turned the engine off. X clears his throat and I immediately let go and jump off his bike.

"Sorry." I mumble. "Thank you." I add.

I start to head back to my house when I feel his hand grip my elbow. "Helmet." He tells me pointing at my head.

I swallow. "Right, sorry." I mutter. He drops his hand and I proceed to take the helmet off and hand it back to him.

He takes it from me our hands grazing one another, I gasp feeling my cheeks turn a deep red. X gives me a curious smile and shakes his head. "Hey, can I ask you something?"

I swallow, and nod slowly. "What is it?" I manage to say.

"Why are you so nervous around me?" His voice sends shivers down my spine. "You act like you've never talked to guys before."

If only he knew, when it came to guys I either ran away or avoided them all together.

"You have a boyfriend don't you?" He asks.

I look at the ground for a few seconds before looking back up at him. "Never." I whisper.

X looks at me with wide eyes and in confusion. He's about to say something else when suddenly a voice calls out to him. Behind him a few feet away is a girl with beautiful curly hair, pink lips and a slim body.

"Babe, I've been waiting for you." She crosses her arms over her chest.

For some odd reason I feel my heart sink, I look back at the ground now trying my best to mask my disappointment. "I'll see you around...um..."

"Flor." I forgot I never told him my name.

X smiles, "Flor." He says in a Spanish accident which takes me by surprise. "My number 1." He adds.

My heart flutters and I raise my eyes giving him a soft smile which he returns.

I stand there a few seconds longer watching him jog back to the girl whose waiting for him. Of course he has a girlfriend why wouldn't he? A guy like him was too beautiful not to be loved by many.

-I'll update more chapters soon, thank you for reading, thoughts?-