Why She Stayed (xxxtentacion)

X.66

"Everyone wants to book you." Mr. Hasakawa tells me, "They want to know what lies beneath those hauntingly beautiful eyes."

I look back at the cover of the magazine, blushing. Mr. Hasakawa was very serious about me, if it wasn't for him asking to take me back I wouldn't have this success. "It's all thanks to you." I tell him grateful.

He scoffs, shaking his head, he reaches for my hands. "Flor, you are so beautiful, yet you aren't able to see it for yourself." Holding my hands now he gives them a squeeze. "You can become something greater than what you are now."

I know what he meant by that, he wanted me to do that movie. A film depicting a girl who ends up being a victim of violence and left behind by the people who are suppose to love and take care of her. "I'm not so sure if I should do the film." I whisper.

He looks at me for a second before speaking, "I'm not sure what happened to you before...you use to have more faith in yourself...I just hope that old part of you will resurface some day." He pulls our hands away and pats me on the top of the head.

"You need to become stronger for yourself Flor." He says as he walks further away.

I stay silent in my seat, staring down at the magazine which I made the cover of. There was a strange glint in my eye. I remember the day I had the photo shoot, I was told to pretend I wanted something, something I loved...I had thought of X that day.

Shaking my head, I set the magazine back down and head over to the lockers to grab my bag and walk home.

It was cloudy, we were finally getting rainy weather again. I missed the rain, I always felt more at ease when the sky was gray.

I was rounding the block to the corner of my house when I spotted a woman with her child walking towards my path.

She held his hand as she stared up at the sky, strangely though she seemed oddly familiar to me. I felt like I had seen her somewhere before but I wasn't so sure.

She lowers her eyes, looking at me now and comes to a sudden halt. Her eyes widen and she mouths out a name but I can't quite hear her.

I stop too, unsure of how to proceed. My eyes flicker to the little kid, he looks to be about 9 years old but I'm not quite sure. As I watch him for some reason I come to think of X. The resemblance to him he shares is undeniable.

Who were they?

"It's you isn't it?" She speaks up loud enough for me to hear.

I don't say anything and instead keep my silence. "Your that girl, Flor?"

This time she's caught my attention and that's when I recall where I've seen them both, that day I had seen Venna at X's old house this lady and her son had both been there.

Was she Venna's mother?

"I finally get to meet you." She smiles a sincere warm smile but her eyes wane and for a moment I see a bit of sadness in her smile.

"Who are you?" I ask.

That's when she steps closer to me, the gap shortening between us. "I'm Jah-" She paused. "I'm X's mother and this is his little brother."

My brows furrow together in confusion, how could she possibly know me when I had never met her before. "Nice to meet you." I say in a robotic voice, lost in thought.

Her smile fades, she brushes strands of her hair behind her ear and continues to look at me. "I just always wanted to meet you." She admits.

"Why?" I ask aloud.

"He was always telling me about you. He never talked to me about any girls. But he was always mentioning a Flor." She stared at the necklace on my neck, her eyes saddening. "You did the one thing no one could."

My heart started to skip a beat. "You made him happy and for that I wanted to thank you." She reached for my hand, but I was too overwhelmed to move let alone breathe. I just sorta stood there.

I shook my head and broke away our contact. "We're not together anymore." I say.

But she ignores me. "He's waiting for you..." There's a moment of silence as she gets that same distant look in her eyes again. "He'll always be waiting for you," she says quietly. The sadness in her answer makes me want to cry. "Your the only girl who gave his life some light, and you know what he even told me?" She asks.

I back away a few steps, I didn't want to hear any more. It hurt to hear this especially at a time in my life were I wanted to forget, forget it all.

I hear an engine roar and my eyes searched for the person I knew it would be. And before I know it Scar is walking towards me. "He loves you." She whispers to me. "More than you think."

I shake my head, not wanting to hear anymore. "I can see it in your eyes, all you want to do is be by his side right? You still love him. Please, dont throw him away." The urgency in her voice confused me, but when Scar closes the gap between us she looks from him to me and shakes her head.

"Stop lying to yourself." She whispers before turning to leave. 

For some reason I grow angry, I was so tired of feeling guilty because of this, so I didn't hold back. I told my truth, the version I was fooled to believing. "He threw me away." I say. "I needed him...that day at the hospital...and he never came."

She turns back looking at me confused. "He-"

"Flor!" Megan shouts nervously, linking our arms. "Scar gave me a ride." She says, pulling me away as we head the opposite path where Scar was waiting.

I turn back as she dives into telling me all about her day. Our eyes meet but I'm the first to look away.

"Who is that?" Scar asks.

My eyes widen. "No one." I whisper with a heavy heart.