He sits on the bed, watching the white walls, counting the stars in his head while avoiding all thoughts of the past.
For a moment it seems like this could be everything he has to show for.
These white walls.
"Hey call me back." He hears his voice echo through the last voice mail he left Ski.
And just like the past few weeks he wouldn't get a response.
It seemed like he could trust no one anymore.
He had no one.
He was all alone.
That was the sudden realization that settled upon him as he stares at the walls and finally the mirror where he sees his reflection.
He hated himself.
Hated how everything he touched, everyone he loved...he hurt or ruined.
And as he sits there he thinks of the one thing he has kept his mind from drifting to, the one warm place that is still in his heart.
The part of him that still feels alive because of her.
He thinks of her smile, the way her eyes would sparkle when she saw him, how her lips were so soft he fell in love with kissing her, but then again he loved her.
Every inch of her skin was like a blessing to him.
She was his muse, the whole reason he existed was to meet her is what he thought everyday since they were together.
"You'll protect me right?" Flor asks.
"I've always loved you."
"I want to be with you forever." She says as she holds me.
"Did I make you happy?"
"You'll come back for me, right?"
He could feel a pressure in his heart. A shortness of breath, pulling the covers off him he collapses off the bed.
"H- hey." He says breathless calling for someone.
But no one was there.
He was all alone.
The pressure in his heart started to disappear, the tension was easing. His hand had been clutching the beaded bracelet.
"I'm sorry I lied." He whispered.
Part of me was conscious of the situation but I still struggled to grasp how much everything had gone to shit.
I was pretty sure I wasn't going to be able to recover from this one, not after all that has happened.
I craned my neck, looking at the time and no longer could I repress the pain and instead felt it release in a form of a sob.
"X." I mumbled.
He wasn't coming back, he'd left me here all alone and in love. Yet still I refused to believe it, because I was different from the rest of them he'd even told me it himself.
"Your special Flor, your the only girl I would never hurt."
But he hadn't kept that promise, not now not ever again, because he was gone.
YOU ARE READING
Why She Stayed (xxxtentacion)
Romance"I wanted to give him a million reasons to live, even if none of those reasons somehow involved me..." X has led a life full of tragedies and set backs he carries scars and wounds so deep in his heart that love, life, and trust have no meaning. He's...
