Why She Stayed (xxxtentacion)

X.23

My heart pounded against my chest painfully. I held onto a piece of Scar's sweater so we wouldn't get lost in the mix of the crowd. But my mind and heart were elsewhere, my eyes scanning the crowds of girls and boys but not one of them was who I desperately searched for.

Scar managed to get us into the house where it was a bit less crowded, there were a few speakers and a mic set up next to the wall by the kitchen. The kitchen was full of alcoholic beverages of all types. 

"You want something luv?" Scar asked. 

I shook my head. "I don't drink." I mutter. 

He rolls his eyes. "Half the people here aren't supposed to but that's not stopping them now is it?" 

I drop my hand from the back of his sweater and cross my arms over my chest. "You have a habit of mocking me." I say. 

He throws his hands up in defense. "Flor shoot me now it'll only make it easier." 

I shook my head and ignored him. "Your in a mood today." He comments. Scar was right, I was nervous, scared, anxious and most of all I noticed how everyone was looking at me. Those familiar eyes I would get back then too but I had managed to grow accustom to them. Now I was going to have to start all over again. Girls looked at me with envy and hate while the guy's ate me up with lust filled eyes. 

And I hated it. 

Scar headed over to the kitchen where he said he'd get me a kids drink. I ignored his comment and stood off to the side. My eyes settling over the speakers and mic, a group of guys were either leaning against the wall or sitting on the ground beside it. For some reason my eyes kept looking through the group trying to make out why I was starring at them. 

But those eyes that were looking back at me suddenly made sense as to why. My eyes widen and hands tremble at my sides, not sure if to look at him or look away I kept still. The sorrow in his eyes wasn't something I had been able to see. In here I could see emotion in those eyes. His forehead was creased as if something was hurting him.  

And when Scar came back handing me a drink, his features contorted and now he was looking from Scar to me in anger. I took a step forward daring myself to walk over to him but Scar caught my hand, his eyes looking from me to X. "I wouldn't go now." He tells me. "The show's about to start." 

I stay put my eyes still watching X whose avoided eye contact. More and more people start coming inside and I hear someone testing out the mic over the speaker. Girls start talking about how excited they are to be able to see X perform. 

I was excited too for some reason. 

We heard a beat fill the room and I suddenly recognized one of the songs, a few of the girls in the crowd scream and cheered him on while his voice fills the room. I felt my heart race, not being able to believe what I was experiencing. 

X was here singing, his voice filling the room, echoing in my chest my heart fluttering in response. I was gripping my necklace starring at the crowds, my eyes flickering to where he was. He was looking right at me, a small smile on his face. 

I brush strands of my hair away from my face and look back at him. He looks away from me, his eyes staring at something in the crowd. A girl walks over to him, she's wearing very little as possible and wraps her arms around him, staring up at him planting a kiss on his cheek. What suddenly had been a once in a life time experience was turning into a nightmare. 

I forced my eyes to look away. Scar shifts beside me, I can feel him looking at me but I can't say anything. Instead of standing around watching the show continue I turn away and head for the stairs to the second floor. 

"Flor?" Scar caught my hand. 

"Just going to the bathroom." I mumble. 

I hadn't even met his eyes as he asked me. I rushed up the stairs, turning down the hall and into the balcony I found myself standing. It wasn't the restroom but to be honest I wasn't even sure where the bathroom was. 

I just need a few minutes to gather some courage to go back out there. 

"There's that bitch!" Someone shouted. 

Confused about what's happening I turn around, except that I didn't count on getting shoved down to the ground with brute force. I land on my back and arse, my head snapping up eyes slicing into Vena's as she glares at me. "I should've known." She shakes her head, a few other girls emerge from behind her. 

"I-" 

"Shut the fuck up!" She shouted, her hands bawled into fists. "You are so fake. You acted like you didn't know if he was messing with girls...but it was you." She hissed. "He told me he didn't give fuck bout us because he found someone else." 

She walks over to me a hand gripping my hair. I feel my eyes water and I try yanking her hand away from me but the other girls intervene and pull my hand away and pin it behind my back. "Vena let go of me." I demand. 

She throws me again but this time onto the hallway. "X won't like someone as stupid as you." Her words bite. "He likes the hoes, the stupid ones. Give it time he'll fuck you over." And after she finished her threat she lunges at me. 

I don't have time to duck since all the other girls jump in at me too. I can feel pain coming at me from all sides and I have to bite on my tongue to keep myself from screaming. Trying my best to cover myself from her and her gang of friends I back myself into a wall. 

"Oof!" I heard Vena shout out in pain, suddenly one by one each girl that had been attacking me pulls away hastily. I don't have time to register what's happening all I know is I'm being lifted off the ground and into a pair of strong arms. 

I felt a hand pull the strands of hair from my face. "Flor?" I heard the worry in X's voice as he scanned my face making sure I was okay. I gave him a small smile but that didn't ease the anger in his eyes, he turns away from me and looks back at the group. "You dumb bitches think you hard?" 

The anger in his voice sends chills down my spine. "If you have shit to get squared don't be afraid of testing me," I can feel his muscles grow rigid as he shouts at them. "If you girls have the balls to touch her again better not be scared of the consequences." He threatens. 

I felt his grip on me tighten. "Get the fuck out." His voice wanes, "Now, before I do something." I heard the girls mumbling among themselves and one by one they started filing out the hall but Vena was the last to go. 

Her eyes settle over X, "She ain't good enough for you baby." I can hear the worry in her voice, purposely trying to sooth him. "I fucked up X but you know I love you." 

There was that pang in my chest again, a sound of discomfort escapes my lips. X looks away from her and looks at me instead, face full of worry, "Does it hurt?" He asked, ignoring Vena. He lifts a hand to my face running a finger down my cheek. 

He shook his head the anger in his eyes come to a boiling point. I thought he would have snapped there and then but instead he cradles me in his arms bridal style in that way he always does. "Jahseh?" Vena calls for him. 

He ignores her, brushing past her and keeps heading down the hall. I stare up at him seeing the pain and anger take over his features. "You'll fucken regret this." She mutters. 

-tbc-