Why She Stayed (xxxtentacion)

X.28

-recollections of Flor's past-

Emotionless, I stare at myself in the mirror. I take in my swollen eyes and the dark circles beneath them, noting the disbelief still in their hollow reflection. I can still hear my mother's shriek from earlier when I told her, as well as see the stunned look on my dad's face, followed by his gritted jaw and sudden departure so he could go break down in his bedroom over not being able to protect the only woman left in his life still that he had still cared about then, but my dad had a habit of running away when things got bad. 

I shake off the tears and begin tugging my clothes off, suddenly desperate to take a shower and scrub every single part of today from my body. I can smell him all over me,  the perfume that shouldn't be there because officer's said there was no trace of him. No trace of the stalker who grew an obsession with me. 

But I knew he was real. 

The ringing of the bells which he said was what us falling in love sounded like to him was what kept me up at night. The pictures he drew of me, how he fantasized our love would flourish but the worst part was when he sent me strands of my own hair. 

It dawned on me every night after that day I received pieces of my own hair through the mail how had he possibly gotten it? 

So I welcome the scalding water as I scrub and cleanse, even though I know I can't wash this away. I tell myself I need to be strong, I have to be because I was finally doing what I loved and that was modeling. 

But he took everything I loved and turned it to a nightmare. 

That night he chased me after work I was so terrified that I ended up running and running for two hours straight. 

Now what was I going to do? 

To be sane I had to free myself from that monster. And I did what I knew best from my father, I left to a place far far away hoping I'd never see that monster again. 

+ + + 

X walks toward me, the muscles of his bare torso bunching with each step, a cautious smile on his face, and every part of me flutters and quakes in response. 

My bottom lip trembles as he closes the distance, "Did you wait long?" He cocks his head to the side his blonde black hair covering his eyes, I slowly nod my head. 

"Yeah." I mutter. 

With a smile on his face he extends his hands inviting me closer, without another word I dash into those arms, pulling him close to me while I stare him in the eyes. 

Without warning he's taking my face in his hands and kissing me, not seeming to care where we were or if people were watching. I took the initiative this time and traced my tongue along his bottom lip, he opened quickly and I slipped my tongue in. He moaned into my mouth, pulling me closer to him. The kiss was so good that it was making me slightly dizzy. He didn't once try to touch me other than holding my face, which I was surprised about. Maybe I had scared him with my reaction to him touching me like last time. I smiled against his lips at the memory and he pulled away, smiling at me too.  

"Did you miss me?" 

He had been gone for three days, let me tell you those three days were hell. "Yes." I confess. 

"Well my boy's fucked." A familiar male voice calls over his shoulder. 

Ski walks over to us, a drink in his hand. "I'm so glad we're back, this fucker couldn't stop going on about you." I blush. X keeps an arm slung over my shoulder and smacks Ski playfully. 

"You two we're both annoying." Rocky mumbles pulling a cigar from his lips. I wrinkle my nose at the smell and Rocky playfully pats me on the head. "Nice to see you again." He says directing at me. 

I smile at him too. "Flor you need to do something with him, this lil shit kicked out all the pretty ladies. Now what the fuck am I supposed to do?" Ski demanded. 

X sighs and nuzzles his face into my hair, I'm not sure if he's embarrassed or irritated at this point. 

"You better not fuck this up." Rocky point at both me and X. 

I shake my head. "And the fool said he wouldn't fall." Ski mumbles to himself as he heads back the way we came from, X doesn't attempt to let go of me even ask they walk away. 

"They're gone." I tell him. 

He shakes his head. "Just a little bit more." He murmurs. "Let's stay like this a little bit more." He whispers. 

And I gladly oblige. 

-tbc-