Bumblestar: Bow peasants '101 Ways To Kill A Cat' Episode 101 has begun.
Blossomfall: Seriously...?
Bumblestar: May I remind you that I am a serial killer, you dare question me!?
Blossomfall: Really. are you now.
Bumblestar: I-
Blossomfall: Just get on with whatever madness you're planning on accomplishing, please? I'm losing brain cells by just talking to you...
Bumblestar: Grr...
Blossomfall: Great! So where's our mom- oh my gosh I never thought about it that way...we've killed our mother over a hundred times in so many brutal and morbid ways. Dear StarClan! I love it.
Bumblestar: Touché... but anyways WHERE'S MY CHAINSAW? WE'RE GOING ORIGINAL
Blossomfall: Fun!
Briarlight: SO. What's the plan?
Bumblestar: *revs engine* Chainsaw
Briarlight: We should sever her spinal cord so that she can almost feel my pain.
Bumblestar: Sounds fun!
Blossomfall: Sounds like effort to clean up...
Bumblestar: Let's cut off her limbs one by one!
Blossomfall: Sure, if you mop the blood.
Bumblestar: ...
Briarlight: What if we cut off all her claws?
Blossomfall: You'd practically be giving her a manicure, do you want to kill her or pamper her?
Bumblestar: WELL WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?
Blossomfall: *thinking emoji* What if we strangle her
Bumblestar: Boring and cliché
Blossomfall: And what are you?
Bumblestar: Your point?
Blossomfall: Some cliché things can be cool, not-
Bumblestar: YOU THINK I'M COOL!?!?
Blossomfall: No you peasant I said some, and you are far from cool
Bumblestar: :((
Briarlight: Soooooooo... are we gonna kill Mille or not?
Bumblestar: Come on, chainsaw :D
Blossomfall: ...
Bumblestar: :DD
Blossomfall: fien...BUT I'M NOT CLEANING IT UP
Bumblestar: OKI *picks up chainsaw*
Bumblestar: Now let's go find-
Mille: HEY GUYS HI DO YOU SEE BRIAR-OH HELLO BABY HOW ARE SWEET CHEEKS HONEY SUGAR MUFFIN
Briarlight: *drawn out words* Ohhhhhhhh...heeeeyyyyyyy moooommmm... :) *eye twitch*
Bumblestar: Just gonna...*turns on chainsaw*
Mille: HIHIHIHI!!! OH WHAT'S THAT? *grabs chainsaw*
Bumblestar: HEY HEY NO WAIT-
Mille: COOL! *swings around and chops off Bumblestar's head by accident*
Blossomfall: ...
Mille: Oh
Bumblestar: *body is laying on the ground, still*
Blossomfall: you-
Millie: That's unfortunate
Blossomfall: Oh my gosh you killed him
Mille: Yea
Blossomfall: You actually killed him
Mille: So what?
Blossomfall: He was your son!
Millie: Who...?
Blossomfall: Unbelievable...
Mille: ew gross there's blood everywhere it's gonna get in my fur...
Blossomfall: Then wash the blood off the ground!
Millie: I'm not cleaning up the body!
Briarlight: I have to go hunt...uh kits...yum...uhm go hunt kits? Hunt with kits? Yeah um ok bye
Blossomfall: You- you're just gonna leave me with him?
*Crickets*
Blossomfall: Ugh...
Blossomfall: Well, I guess it's time to resurrect you, Bumblestar.
This adventure is over and done, but new stories await. Through years and writer upon writer this work has been slowly crafted. This is the longest running book we've had so far, lasting at around two and a half years, so we've decided to celebrate its completion with a short special. We would like to officially announce our upcoming book, "21 Ways To Resurrect My Stupid, Stupid Brother" The Publish date is yet to be decided but we hope to see you there when this new quest arises. We would like to thank each and every reader who has helped us and supported us through everything we've created. This account has had it's highs and lows but despite that many of you continue to read on and we all appreciate that more than we could ever express. Thank you for making us CloudtailGrandmas, we wouldn't be us without you guys.
Sincerely, ~Moon of CloudtailGrandmas
YOU ARE READING
101 Ways To Kill A Cat
RandomLet Bumblestar show you how. A/N: Do not do this to cats you may happen to know. This book is just a spoof and a joke. In fact, don't do this to anybody. Except for Frost. You can do it to Frost, because nobody cares about Frost and whether she liv...
