Bumblestar: Hello, and welcome to Episode agh-fluffy of 101 Ways to Kill a Cat!
Jayfeather: Not this again...
Bumblestar: Today we will be practicing death by French Revolution!
Brambleclaw: Cut! It's 'death by guillotine', not 'death by French Revolution!
Bumblestar: *sigh* Fine. Today we will be practicing death by guillotine! Our test subject? Well... You'll see... *evil cackle*
Brambleclaw: And helping us today is... *dramatically pushes a curtain away, revealing a cat in a guillotine* Briarlight!
Briarlight: I still think hanging is a much cleaner method of execution...
Bumblestar: Shut up, no one asked you. Brambleclaw, summon Millie!
Brambleclaw: MILLIE COME QUICKLY, BRIARLIGHT'S IN DANGER!
Millie: *Teleports onto the stage* Brairbaby! Where's my Briarbaby?!
Briarlight: Over here... *sigh*
Millie: GET AWAY FROM THERE SHARP METAL IS BAD FOR YOUR HEALTH
Bumblestar: If you cut the rope that's holding up that piece of sharp metal, Briarlight will be freed! *snickers*
Millie: ....
seems legit
*takes out a pair of safety scissors and cuts the rope*
Briarlight: *gets beheaded*
Millie: Cool, it gave her the ability to separate her body from her head!
Bumblestar: *facepaw*
Briarlight: *respawns*
Bumblestar: Well, that'll be all for today's show! *curtains close*
This wonderfully odd chapter is brought to you by le Amazing Annco, who suggests that you let them eat cake.
YOU ARE READING
101 Ways To Kill A Cat
DiversosLet Bumblestar show you how. A/N: Do not do this to cats you may happen to know. This book is just a spoof and a joke. In fact, don't do this to anybody. Except for Frost. You can do it to Frost, because nobody cares about Frost and whether she liv...
