The Wrong Best Friend

Chapter Thirty One: Such A Simpleton

CHAPTER 31: Such A Simpleton.

"But you're the one that I want, if that's really so wrong
Then they don't know what this feeling is like."
-The Chainsmokers.

Lily and I have fought numerous times before, over the stupidest things. This isn't the first time. But it somehow feels that way. I can't look her in the eyes, I chicken out before she even steps in the same room as me. Talking to your best friend shouldn't be so hard.

So I do the only thing I know she can never refuse.

I cook food.

I bake my famous brownies for her, I make pasta the way I know she can't resist, I make her favourite fruit milkshake and force Will to deliver it to her.

I'm still a chicken.

I hear footsteps thudding down the staircase and my heart races when she appears but before I can even blink I'm tackled in a bear hug, her arms almost crushing me in her grip.

“You're an idiot.” she murmurs in my hair and I sag in her arms.

“I'm sorry Lilliana.”

“Say my name again and I'll forget you even exist.”

There she is.

I laugh and pull away. “I'm serious.”

“So am I. You know I hate my name.” she scrunches her nose up and calls out to Will.

“Get that damn food down. I'm starving.”

“I'm not your fucking delivery guy.” he instantly yells back and I cringe.

“Mum Will is using the word you told me not to use.” Emma shouts and Lily looks at me with raised brows.

“William!” Mum yells and I sigh returning her look.

“It's nothing new.”

I hear the doorbell ring and I make my way lazily to throw the door open. She forgived me but I can't bring myself to forgive me. There's this darkness within me that's telling myself that I don't deserve to.

It's small but it's there and I can hear it.

The type of darkness that comes from hurting someone.

By disappointing someone.

By not loving yourself.

And I can't get rid of that darkness that's begun to creep in.

I don't know what light can overshadow it.

But I do know it's not me.

I push the thoughts at the back of my mind, and composing myself quickly wear a smile on my face. Small but real. At least I hope it looks even though it isn't.

A grinning Charlie greets me on the other side with the rest hovering behind him like some troops.

“Who the hell summoned y'all?” I ask confused and Charlie rolls his eyes before walking past me like he owns the house.

“Mi casa es tu casa.” I mutter.

“Sorry to come unannounced, Charlie said he texted you.” Morgan gives me a hug and I beam at her sarcastically.

“Of course he didn't.”

“Lily still here right?” Mason asks, his eyes roaming past me and I roll my eyes.

“Hello to you too Mason. And yes she's here.”

He nods grinning and walks off but not before ruffling my hair.