An Unexpected Family [COMPLETED STORY]

Adjustments

  The doctors told me I was free to go and gave me some pain medicine. I took the elevator upstairs and walked into the living room. I was told to rest more than I was up and moving around and I couldn't train or do any physical activity for 10 days. I could just hear a hum of voices coming from the living room. I assumed it was louder than what I was hearing because you know, I'm half deaf.

  I walked into the living room and it was like I wasn't there, it was nice. The world didn't stop for me and that made me feel actually good about myself. I sat down next to Peter and he held my hand and asked how I was feeling. If I'm being totally honest, I don't really know how I'm feeling. If upset that I can only hear half as well as I used to, I'm glad the men are gone but worried that there are more lurking somewhere. I'm excited to just be back here hanging out. I'm sad that I didn't finish the mission.

  So many emotions and so many choices. How was I feeling? Such a broad spectrum of answers. Such a weighted question. Just trying to come up with an answer gave me a headache.

  "I don't really know," I said plainly. That was the best answer I could come up with.

  "That's okay you know Elena."

  "Thanks. I didn't think it was possible to have this many feelings, let alone all at once," I looked down at our intertwined hands. "How are you?"

  "I'm good El, and you will be too."

  "I sure hope so," I looked back up and smiled at him.

  Peter and I talked about every little thing until the was nothing left to talk about. I couldn't hear him though, only enough to understand what he was saying. A mere whisper. The doctor told me it would be like that for a while and it would take time for my hearing to come back all the way, but for now... this is the best I had. I felt bad asking Peter to repeat himself but I wanted to feel like nothing changed. Everything was going to be different now, I guess I had to accept it.

  People had to talk louder around me and stand more on the left than the right. I felt bad, they shouldn't have to do that. I told them over and over that I can hear them and it's fine, but they refuse.  I didn't want to have to impact their lives like this, I wanted them to feel like everything was normal. If they treated everything normally, it would make me feel so much more comfortable.

  I was always hurt, unable to work. I didn't add anything to the team, if anything I took them away from their job to look after me. I was like the baby of the group. It really sucks, not being good enough... but that's how the real world is. I feel like I'm the least skilled out of everyone. I almost died because I was so reckless during the mission.

  What got me the most was Peter. I could tell he was trying to stay strong for me, I knew it wasn't easy. I didn't want him to go through this, he deserved someone who's good for him. I've done nothing for him except stress, and that isn't fair. I love him so damn much, but I've been too afraid to tell him. I don't even really know what real love is. I'm 16 years old and I've been through so much but I've put the people around me through so much more.

  Peter deserved so much better, and that's what he's going to get.