All becAuse of A

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Hanna's POV

It has been a week since I had Madison and I week since I had eaten anything. since the time I made myself throw up I've pretty much given up on food and all because of A.

I keep getting these messages calling me fat or hefty Hanna and it makes me feel so bad about myself. I hate it and I hate A. I hate how A had so much control over what I do. The only thing keeping me happy is Madison. just looking at her makes me smile.

"Hanna come downstairs and have lunch I'll stay with Madison" Caleb said coming upstairs.

I went downstairs and pretended to open the fridge. then I got a text message

"You sure you wanna do that Hefty Hanna?

-A"

I slammed the fridge door shut

What's wrong?" he said running downstairs.

I really couldn't help myself I just started crying.

"Oh my god are you ok?" he asked

"Yes I'm fine just stressed." I answered.

"Stressed about what? going back to school?" he said "you don't have to if your not ready"

"No it's not that, I want to go back to school. it's just A that I'm worried about." I said going to hug him

"Hanna don't worry about A I just want you to tell me if they ever send you messages"

"I will but I'm afraid that they will hurt Madison." I said crying and knowing I was lying about the messages

"Hanna leaving her alone for two seconds is fine." he told me, and I knew it was.

"I guess." I said wanting to end this conversation

"I love you hanna."

"I love you more" I replied looking into his eyes.

"I love you most." he kissed me and went back upstairs with madison.

I didn't eat anything and thankfully because of my crying Caleb didn't notice.

I spent the rest of the afternoon waiting for the girls to finish school so we can hang out but after A sent me another text I really didn't want to anymore.

"Hey hefty Hanna maybe I won't have to kill you if you do it to yourself

-A"

My mind kept going back to the day I first cut myself. I knew it was bad but I couldn't help myself. I went into the bathroom and locked the door and started cutting my thigh in the same place as last time.

So many memories came flooding back but I couldn't stop. then I thought of what spencer said the first time and stopped myself. I got in the shower and put band-aids on the cuts before getting changed and going to see the girls.

I tried to get my old clothes on but they were too big .My pants were really lose I had to wear my belt tighter than usual and my tight shirts weren't so tight anymore. I looked at myself in the mirror and realized how small I had gotten. but I still didn't feel small enough.

~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~<>~

I was heading out the door when I got a text

"Be careful Hefty Hanna I hope you remember I'm everywhere.

Kisses -A"

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