HARD WORK

HARD_WORK_94

I wish we could touch some more
I'm sitting, working on this letter
The first line I write, I was wrong
So wrong, so wrong, so wrong, so wrong...

' Is this how it's going to be even after that baby is born.'

Raymond asked taking Rj and his diaper bag from Maya outside the front door. Maya kissed her son goodbye and told him to enjoy his day before closing the door on her estranged husband's face. She slid down to the floor as soon as she had closed the door, this was all too much for her but she would not let him have the satisfaction. Maya needed a proper apology than " I'm sorry".

' Hey mommy's little prince charming. How was your day?'

She lifted him out of his fathers arms eight hours after they had left, while avoiding contact with him. She had her hand out for his diaper bag and was surprised after she felt nothing in her hand and looked up to find him starring at them.

' Ray. Bag!'

' Can we please talk Maya. Please let me come home to my family.'

' Ray.... why should I let you back into my life. After all that you did to me and are currently doing to me.'

Maya went into the house to place her son down since Ray was not about to leave any minute. He followed her into the living room.

' Maya I broke up with Kim-'

' So? Do you want a medal for doing something you shouldn't have done in the first place as a married man! Ray don't treat me like a fool. My feelings are not a toy you can play with. I admit I was wrong for refusing to give you a child. I was selfish and for that I am sorry but I did not file for divorce because you wanted a child. You did that. Now please just live your life how you had planned on living after the divorce.'

' I never wanted a divorce. I. I.I  thought doing that would make you see how seriously I wanted a child and you would make you reconsider. I surely never meant for it to get this far.'

' Like I said, my feelings ain't yours to play with. Our marriage was not yours to decide to play with. We promised to love each other through the good and the bad in front of the priest, the all mighty and all our loved ones but as soon as shit hit the fan, you were out. Our marriage meant nothing to you.'

Raymond could hear the tears in her throat. He wanted to hold and comfort her but he was afraid of her reaction. Maya could be unpredictable when hurting.

' It meant a lot. I was just so hurt when-'

Maya laughed but sarcastically.

' Huh! You were hurt?! So you felt that an eye for an eye would even the score?!'

' Maya refusing to have my child hurt me. I felt I wasn't good enough for you. Since the first day we met I knew that I wanted a part of me and a part of you to be one. Through marriage and our future children. I know you told me from the get go that you didn't see yourself being a mother but I hoped that would change and look at you now changing diapers.'

Maya bit on her lower lip trying to hide her smile but he knew he was getting to her.

' Maya I fucked up and I know that. I just need you to give me a chance to prove how sorry I am.'