Bangtan Stoopids

192

I ain't dead!

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Seokjin: so, I was wondering..who the fuck ate my pie?

Namjoon: oh dear god

Jimin: hyung...it's 6.30 in the morning?!

Seokjin: who ate my dang pie?!

Yoongi: fuck your pie. I was sleeping.

Taehyung: ......there was no name on it

Jungkook: it's just pie hyung..Taehyungie will buy you a new one

Seokjin: He can buy one after I whoop his ass

Hoseok: I'd like to see you try and get within 5 feet of him without dying..

Namjoon: baby, it was just pie. Please leave it

Seokjin: NO! IT WAS MY PIE!

Taehyung: I'LL BUY YOU A NEW ONE I'M SORRY! I WOKE UP AT 2 A.M. AND I WAS STRESSED ABOUT THE WHOLE RELATIONSHIP THING...and the pie looked comforting 🥺

Yoongi: you made my baby boy sad

Jimin: it's literally just pie...why did it turn into chaos

Namjoon: because Jinnie would both kill and die for his food

Hoseok: ...so, since Taehyung is now distressed.....do I, do I fight hyung?

Jungkook: are you guys dating and everything again?

Taehyung: NO! 😭

Jimin: is that supposed to mean no as in...no dating or as in not yet?

Yoongi: Hoseok has thus far refused to rejoin our relationship. I'm not mad, just sad.

Seokjin: excuse me...MY PIE?!

Hoseok: FUCK YOUR PIE MAN! TAEHYUNG IS LITERALLY SOBBING AS HE'S GETTING DRESSED TO HIY A NEW PIE FOR YOU!

Namjoon: on Jin's behalf, I would like to formally apologize for his behavior

Jungkook: get you mans in check bro.

Jimin: ..Jungkook...

Yoongi: the disrespect

Jungkook: please calm your husband hyung***

Hoseok: Yoongs, I'm suddenly going with Taehyung to the store for a pie because he's pouting and my heart hurts...care to join?

Namjoon: I took his phone. He feels bad and said you don't have to get a pie...but we do need milk.

Jungkook: also, be sure you don't get attacked by anyone with milk.

Jimin: I'm not even gonna ask.

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Sorry I've been gone for like a whole ass two months...I'm a tired sloth