Love Hurts, Doesn't It? ✔️

•PROLOGUE•

She was gone.

The high pitched sound from the defibrillator only increased the tempo of my heartbeat which slowly started to suffocate me.

I steadily turned to it's small screen and looked at the straight line across it with the heart vitals above it reading zero.

No heartbeat. She's dead.

I looked back at her, her dark skin was covered with tiny wrinkles that reflected all the times she labored for hours on end to make a huge mark in her career and to help provide for her family.

Her once smooth face was now scrawny and void of the natural glow it always exuberated because the life that used to pump those ever working cells of hers was truant.

Her eyes were closed, her skin was turning pale, her lips were slightly parted due to the fact that she just spoke her last words.

She's gone.

I couldn't move, I couldn't think, I was numb.

She's gone.

I didn't want to believe it, how am I going to move past this? How am I going to cope with the void that was now forming in my life? How am I going to fill up the hole that was emerging in my frail heart?

I gripped her doddering hand as tightly as I could as I felt the tears brimming at the back of my eyes, threatening to fall at any moment because of the overwhelming weight of emotions.

Still, it was like my entire body was frozen in place.

All I could do was stare at her, thinking about all the things I still had to say.

She's gone

She can't be, she's just sleeping. Yeah, she's just taking one of those her afternoon naps.

But I couldn't even convince myself of that not because of the deafening sound of the damned defibrillator, but because her hands were getting cold.

Her hands were never cold.

They were always warm and soft, finely decorated with wrinkled tiny veins and scars that held stories from decades of life. The same hands that helped me and guided me for the past seventeen years, the same hands that kept me sane and shielded me from the scowling and menacing eyes of the world.

She's gone

It finally hit me and the tears I fought so hard to hold back suddenly gushed out, they streamed down my face in full force landing on the white hospital sheets of the bed in small, little droplets.

Keep it together, she would never want to see you breaking down this way, that is not what she would want!

My subconscious tried to comfort me but it felt more like a critic which made my heart hurt even more because it was a confirmation she truly isn't here with me, I'm not strong.

I screamed, bawling my eyes out at the realization that my best friend was truly gone. Taken away from me like it was nothing, like it was no big deal, like it was meant to be easy for me from now on.

The sudden loss of her placed a heavy rock over my heart, the light that she alone contributed in my life felt like it was now extinguished by the clutches of death.

She was taken away from me and wasn't going to see me grow up.

The doors to her hospital room opened and someone grabbed my shoulders trying to pull me back, I kept lashing and screaming at the person to let me go, to let me stay with her because she was going be alone if I leave and I didn't want her to be alone, I want her to be alive and with me.

I watched the nurses disconnect their wires and IVs, it made me furious and I yelled at them still struggling with the unknown figure trying to force me out of the room.

No. No. Put those back, she's not dead. She's only sleeping. Please put those back, she'll die without them!

Nobody was listening to me and just like that I was forcefully dragged out of the room.

I didn't even get to say goodbye.

I love you Grandma.