Forgotten Malfoy// Cedric

Chapter 62

I tried hard to hold myself together, every night I replayed the scene, where Sirius died instead of me, where Harry was dying in front of me. I remember Remus holding onto me for dear life. I couldn't forget the hundreds of ministry members reaching out trying to grab my attention that night. Begging for answers, Remus was pushing me through right behind Harry and Dumbledore. They were loud, the sounds and people were blurring together, but I felt empty, and confused.

I didn't go back to Hogwarts that night, Remus took us straight home. But not to Sirius', to his home. I remember not saying a single word to him. As soon as he shut the door I spun around, my mouth dropped letting out a terrible cry, my knees were weak, and he fell down with me. I remember crying, and not being able to stop. He held me close, wiping his own tears, rocking back and forth. I wasn't sure what I was feeling, there was anger, at Bellatrix my father, even at Sirius. There was also betrayal, hurt, confusion, sadness, and loss. I knew that I would never forgive myself, for letting him take that curse. I remember Remus, hours later pulling us off of the floor. He sat me down and began wiping my face, cleaning up the blood, and cuts. I didn't move or fight him, I remained still. At the end he knelt down holding my head into his shoulder, and I again couldn't move. I remember him putting sheets on an old spare bed, leading me to it, and I remember laying down and not getting back up for days. I remember speaking the bare minimum to Remus, him forcing me to eat. I remember full moons being the worst, Remus would leave for a few days, and I wouldn't move. Only getting up to eat a small meal each day. I remember taking a glimpse at the daily prophet one morning seeing my father had been locked up in Azkaban. And I remember hearing Remus cry in the middle of the night, he didn't know I could hear, but I did, and it only hurt me more.

I'd been surviving but I didn't feel alive. I did what I could, what I felt good enough to do. But I never opened any letters from my friends I didn't want to hear their sympathy, or pity. I lost my best friend, and the only true family member who protected me, and cared enough to die for me. Remus and I went for little walks, we made sure we were both alright.

One morning I felt Remus sit down beside me. I sat up giving him a small smile. "Morning," he nodded, "I have some news." I looked up at him confused, "I have to go, help the order, I've arranged for you to go to the Weasleys. I'm sorry Alyssa I really am." He leaned back, and I rested my head on his shoulder, letting him hug me. "I'll be fine Remus." He kissed my forehead, "I know you will be, you're always fine. Sirius wouldn't want you to be like this any longer." I sighed, "its not fair, none of it." He stood up pulling me out of bed, "no it's not, but nothing that's happened is." I agreed, looking at all of my Hogwarts things that I haven't touched all summer. "I'll make us something to eat."

He went off to the kitchen and I packed my clothes quickly, and followed him out there. I ate a few bites of my toast staring out the window. "Are you ready?" He asked. I nodded bracing myself to face them all. I gave Remus one last hug, "stay safe sweetheart." I stepped in the fireplace, "I love you." I threw down the powder and when I opened my eyes I stepped out of the Weasley fireplace.

"Alyssa?" Molly squealed forcing me into her arms. "Oh darling, how are you holding up? Have you eaten? What can I do?" I smiled, hugging her back, "I'm alright, thank you." She nodded leading me up the stairs where I saw Harry, Ron and Hermione. I stepped forward letting Harry pull me in. I pushed my face into his shoulder not wanting to let go. "He's gone." I nodded, "he's gone."