Chapter 46

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No words could form, instead I walked out of the dining room and upstairs. I sat down on the bed, looking at the bag beside me. I first pulled out his quidditch jersey, I remembered signing it in third year. Next came out a framed picture of the two of us kissing at Yule ball. I smiled looking down at it. I grabbed a handful of papers, it took me a minute but I realized it was instructions on how to build our home, there was even a section on how to craft a canoe. I closed the bag not wanting to see anything else. I held the jersey up to my nose taking in the smell of him. A few tears fell down my face, and I wanted them gone before anyone else came up here, I started walking to the bathroom but I saw a figure standing in the family tree room.

I made my way to the door seeing Tonks staring at a blacked out hole. "Wanna see mine?" I asked. She jumped turning around. "Sorry I didn't mean to scare you." She smiled, "don't be." I then gently set my finger on where my name should've been. "Mines over here." I stared at it, "so me you and Sirius, all kicked out." Tonks laughed, "I suppose that's true." Ginny came in, "I was just looking for you Tonks, sorry didn't realize you were busy."

I gave Ginny a small smile, "no we were just talking you two can go." Ginny nodded stepping back to observe the whole room accidentally bumping into the portrait of Sirius' mother behind her. "YOU FILTHY BLOOD TRAITOR. GET OUT! GET OUT! YOU DONT BELONG HERE, YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO PEOPLE LIKE YOU TWO IN OUR FAMILY. YOU YOUNG LADY ARE PATHETIC JUST LIKE SIRIUS WAS. YOU CANT DEPEND ON OTHER PEOPLE TO SAVE YOU. MY SON DOES NOT CARE FOR YOU, NO ONE DOES. THAT BOY KILLED HIMSELF BECAUSE OF YOU... IT.."

"ENOUGH." Sirius shouted at the portrait. I started walking out of the room stopping to glare at her, "bitch." I made my way back to my bedroom laying down. "She just says whatever she can to hurt people." Sirius said pushing open my door. "I'm fine Sirius." He sighed, "you're mad at me again?" I shook my head, "when did I say that?" He shrugged sitting down beside me, "are you going to write a speech for him?" I sat up my eyes were threatening me with tears, "get out. Please just leave me alone." He nodded, "I'll see you later?" I sighed, "yes."

Later on in the night I heard all of my friends in the next room, they were obviously playing some sort of game, and eventually the laughter became too much for me. I knocked on Sirius' door. "Come in." I pushed open the door and they were both in bed, Remus was reading and Sirius looked like he was about to go to bed. "I just came to say goodnight." Remus smiled setting the book down, "goodnight." I walked over to him letting myself get pulled into a hug. Sirius nodded, "night." I stood there uncomfortably. "Is there something else?" Remus asked. I shook my head, "no.. um sorry." Sirius scoffed, "you didn't come in here for no reason, why aren't you speaking?" Remus nudged him, "enough Sirius. What's the matter?" I shrugged glaring at Sirius, "never mind, goodnight."

When I shut the door I went downstairs sitting at the table by myself. I pulled out a parchment, trying to write out something to say for Cedric. I wasn't sure what to say at these types of things. Was I supposed to pour my heart out to the people who attended, I had no idea. Maybe I was supposed to vent, get everything off my chest. I was angry, upset that he was gone that some disgusting person killed my boy. I had scribbled down a few ideas before I heard footsteps. Sirius stepped back when he saw me at the table.

"You shouldn't be up." I shrugged, "didn't know I had a bedtime." He grabbed a cup, "well you do, get to bed." I made no attempts to move. "Now Alyssa." I grabbed my parchment leaving the room. When I got upstairs Fred and George were sitting in our room talking. "What are you doing?" George asked. I set everything down joining them on the bed. "Was trying to write a speech for Ced." Fred put his arm around my shoulder, "don't worry about that nonsense speak from your heart." I smiled, "thats actually not a bad idea. But in-front of all those people, I'm just nervous." George nodded, "you loved him, anyone can tell, those people are irrelevant, tomorrow is for Cedric, and if you don't cry, mourn, or even feel angry then there truly is something wrong with you." I rolled my eyes, "thank you George." Fred smiled, "why don't you lay down, you have a big day tomorrow."

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