I trembled as I looked down at my hands, feeling my heart beating out of my chest as my mind raced.
I couldn't deal with this alone right now. I couldn't handle the feeling of dread that was settling in my chest, but I couldn't move.
I just sat there, looking at the blood, feeling like the world was crumbling around me. I started sobbing uncontrollably, not able to contain the fear anymore.
I dropped the clothes then went to grab my phone, shakily dialing Colby's number.
I needed help.
"Hellooooo beautiful." Colby slurred as I sobbed. "P-please sober up." I whispered as he gasped slightly. "What's going on, V?" He asked with a serious tone as I stumbled slightly, almost falling to the ground from the anxiety.
"B-bleeding. I'm bleeding." I said and put my hand on my belly. "Where. Where are you bleeding, Violet?" Colby asked as the noise on his side of the phone died down.
"The baby, Colby. The baby!" I sobbed out as he gasped. "Okay, stay calm, V. How much blood is there? I'm gonna help you, you just have to try and stay calm." He said quietly as I shook my head.
"N-not a lot..I felt her kicking earlier Colby...I felt her kicking." I sobbed out as I brought my hand to my chest. "Sam, call my mom!" Colby said as I sat on the floor, holding my stomach.
"It's late, so Sam is calling my mom, she might know the answer as to what's going on. I need you to breathe for me, baby." Colby cooed as I struggled.
"I need you." I whispered as he sighed sadly. "I'm so sorry, baby. I'm booking a flight as we speak." He said as I shook my head. "N-no...not until we find out what's going on." I said and rubbed my chest anxiously.
"Violet, how much blood is there?" Sam asked as I looked down at the underwear. "I-it's not much...just a light red." I explained as I tried to calm down.
"Violet, sweetheart. Can you hear me?" Colby's mom's voice sounded through the phone. "Yes." I said quietly as I looked down at my belly.
"What you're going through is normal, darling. Your body is just preparing for the baby to come. I know it's scary, but it's gonna be okay. When's your next appointment?" She asked as I wiped my face.
"Monday." I whispered and rubbed my belly. "Okay, just monitor the blood and if it becomes heavier then go to the hospital. Just bring it up with your doctor when you go to your appointment." Colby's mom said as I nodded slowly.
"Okay...I'm so sorry." I whispered as she breathed a laugh. "I remember having the same reaction when I was pregnant with Gage. It's scary seeing blood when you don't know why it's there." She explained as I nodded. "Thank you so much for your help." I said quietly.
"You're welcome, sweetheart. Just try to rest and relax." She said as I nodded. "I'll try." I said then reached over and grabbed a tissue to wipe my face with.
"V?" Colby asked as I sniffled. "I'm here." I said as he sighed slightly. "Are you okay?" He asked as I nodded. "I'll be okay." I said quietly.
"Do you want me to come home?" He asked as I shook my head. "No, I'm sorry for bothering you." I said as he breathed a laugh. "You aren't bothering me, V. You were scared." He said quietly as I put my hand on my belly.
"She scared me." I said quietly as I sniffled. "Yeah, me too. She's okay though. Did you want me to send Kat over there?" He asked as I nodded.
"Yeah, I don't want to be alone right now." I said then stood up and walked towards the closet since I was still in my towel.
"Okay, baby. Sam's telling her to come, do you want me to stay on the phone until she gets there?" He asked as I shook my head.
"No, go have fun. I'll be okay, I'm just gonna go bake something." I said as he laughed. "Don't work yourself too hard, V." He said as I nodded.
"I won't." I said then put him on speaker phone so I could get dressed. "I love you, Violet." Colby said as I nodded. "I love you, too. I'm sorry for the scare." I said as he breathed a laugh.
"It's okay, baby. Don't hesitate to call me." He said as I nodded. "I won't. Now go have fun. Kat should be here soon." I said then pulled one of his sweatshirts over my head.
"Okay, bye babe." He said then hung up. As soon as he did this I let out a sigh then finished getting dressed.
"You can't scare mommy like that." I said to my belly then turned to go downstairs. I knew she had literally nothing to do with what happened, but I was so scared that we lost her.
I was so scared that I was going to be in love with her, only for her to be ripped away from me like everyone else.
When I got to the kitchen I started pulling out ingredients to make cookies since those sounded amazing to me right now.
I turned on some music then got started, only to be interrupted by someone knocking on the door.
I went over to open it since I knew that it was Kat.
"Are you okay, V?" She asked and gave me a hug. "Yeah, it was a false alarm. Apparently it's normal to bleed a little bit during pregnancy. That would have been nice to know." I said then pulled away and walked to the kitchen.
"Pregnancy seems scary." Kat said as I went back to the mixing bowl. "It is. It's equally beautiful though.
She was kicking for the first time today." I said with a smile and put my hand on my belly.
Her kicks weren't strong enough to be felt from the outside but the fact that I could feel them made me so happy.
"That's amazing! Does it feel weird?" She asked as I nodded. "Yeah, it's like when your stomach rumbles. It's crazy that it's a human though." I said as she sat down at the island in front of me.
"That's amazing. Did you want to watch movies or something? Oooo we can get Taco Bell." Kat said as I laughed. "Taco Bell sounds so good." I said with a smile as she grabbed her phone.
I liked that Kat was trying to distract me from what happened. I appreciated that she wasn't treating me like a child that needed to be coddled, she was just getting back to normal with me.
We spent the next hour or so making cookies and waiting for our Taco Bell. I knew it was kind of a toxic trait to bake every time I was stressed out but it seriously helped me so much.
I was feeling better about the whole bleeding thing but I couldn't shake the feeling that I was doing something wrong.
I knew that my body was going through a lot of changes but seeing blood really really scared me even if it was 'normal' I didn't want to think of the possibility of something going wrong.
That scared me so much.
Kat and I ended up staying up watching movies before she crashed. I couldn't fall asleep no matter how much I tried. I was just afraid that something would change overnight.
I ended up staying up all night, reading books and scrolling aimlessly through social media.
Colby and I announced the pregnancy a couple weeks ago to the fans so I would see a lot of theories about what the baby was and what we were naming it.
I had to admit that their reaction was adorable. I felt a little bad that I was hesitant on telling them but I had my reasons.
I could see us introducing Nova to the fans one day but I wasn't sure how involved she would be with them.
I scrolled for a long time before I felt myself starting to doze off. I could tell the sun was about to rise but I needed to listen to my body and sleep.
I rubbed my belly gently as my eyes closed. "I love you little Nova bear." I said quietly as I yawned. I fought my body off for a little longer before I finally let myself drift off.
I needed to rest.
