Corpse Husband One-shots

Priorities*

Author: https://thefanficmonster.tumblr.com/

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warnings: Swearing

Genre: Fluff

Summary: All Corpse's fans experienced the biggest adrenaline rush mixed with fear when they awaited the merch's drop. There was always that risk of being five minutes too late and all would've been sold out. Some people, however (one in particular) wanted to take no risks.

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It's a very exciting, stressful, adrenaline and anxiety inducing day. I'd like to imagine myself as a general, commanding and bossing around my last few braincells. The majority have died due to my lack of sleep and burn-out from balancing college, work and my YouTube channel.

One braincell is maintaining basic human functions, keeping me at a level only slightly higher than a zombie.

The other is going over today's To-Do list which currently doesn't consist of much - eating, staying hydrated, breathing and refreshing the merch page.

And the third is focused on that lastly mentioned task - refreshing the merch page, impatiently awaiting the drop of Corpse's merch.

It's not like me constantly refreshing the page will make the items pop up sooner. Not like me sitting here has any sort of point whatsoever. But it has to me, ok?! Ok yeah I need to chill out. Once I cop a hoodie or two I promise myself I'll eat something and take a nap. I swear.

I'm paranoid of being like thirty seconds too late - that's more than possible, having witnessed the overwhelming enthusiasm from Corpse's fan when he announced the launch. I felt every bit of it.
I decided not to tell Corpse I will be getting his merch, I wanted to keep it a surprise. I dismissed any suspicion he had by subtly implying I'll throw all my money on Christmas gifts for my family, saying that I'd be broke as fuck by December 25th. That, while not a complete lie, was of course an absurd claim. Given the fact that Corpse and I have been dating for a little over seven months now, I have been present for all the phases of the merch launching process. From the debates of weather he should do it or not, to deciding on the design which I helped a lot with, not gonna lie - I've been pretty active in the orbit of creation of these hoodies, seeing them available for purchase will be the ultimate satisfaction. However, there's one feeling that will top that - owning one and wearing it.

Oh my God, the drop is happening in less than five minutes. I can absolutely NOT miss this. This is one of the most important moments for Corpse and his fandom and for me! I have been waiting for this since the first time he approached me, asking if I thought his fans would care for a merch line of his.

"I know I'd buy even an eyelash if you were selling it." I remember telling him, dead serious without even the slightest hint of sarcasm. He knew I wasn't messing around.

"I'll take that as a positive answer." He nodded slowly as though he was afraid I'd pounce if he said the wrong thing. "You know you don't have to buy an eyelash of mine, right? I mean, you already have me completely. Eyelashes included."

That interaction still cracks me up, mostly cause we were both so serious when we had it. I'm talking Texas Holdem Poker levels of serious and intense. I think that's what pushed him over the edge and into the pit of creative ideas for designs. As I mentioned, I was honored with the opportunity to be a part of that process as well as deciding the date and time of the launch.

Less than three minutes on the clock. Now the uneasiness is really kicking in - my leg bouncing and my fingers tapping the buttons on my keyboard repeatedly. The tension in the room in unreal, to the point of irrationality. As if it's a life or death situation. Because it is. Just kidding. Or am I?